Station Schedule
May, 2024
| Date | AM Headline | PM Headline | Special Note |
|---|---|---|---|
| Friday, 05/17/2024 | The world watches in fascination as unprecedented underground pursuit unfolds | ||
| Thursday, 05/16/2024 | Pursuing police enter secret subterranean city beneath the streets. Coppers and criminals engage in cat-and-mouse chase through captivating urban maze | WWW Interns Transform into Instant Celebrities with Astonishing Weather Predictions as Peculiar Powers Unleashed when Interns Tap into Meteorological Abilities | |
| Wednesday, 05/15/2024 | Sirens blare as armored car leads police on high-speed chase through city streets. Armored car escapes capture, disappears into underground tunnel system | Interns at World Wide Weather Experience Life-Changing Phenomenon as People Flock to Witness Interns Extraordinary Human-Weather Connection | |
| Tuesday, 05/14/2024 | A forest of glowing mushrooms sprouting overnight in a park as An army of squirrels dressed as knights engage in battle | Intrigue and Discovery: The Citizen Scientists Develop Their Characters in the Otherworldly Realm and The Quest for Answers and Harmony Begins as the Resolution of Humanitys Role in Weather Systems Takes Hold | |
| Monday, 05/13/2024 | A Whimsical Cycle of Meteorological Magic Engulfs Trudy as She is Trapped Between Spontaneous Rainbow Showers and Tropical Snowball Fights. Ultimately, Trudys Extraordinary Journey Redefines Ordinary Days Forevermore | Investigative Report by isomorph_: Its Solar Flare Awareness Day at WWW, staff has been reviewing safety protocols and practicing panicking techniques | |
| Sunday, 05/12/2024 | MOTHERSDAY MIRACLE: MOTHER RETURNS. | Mother has returned with a brave new warning... leans in close: Dont you think its time for Mothers Day | |
| Saturday, 05/11/2024 | Mysterious Weather Device Unleashes Trudys Curiosity as Trudy Transforms the Rainforest with Dr. Nimbuss Device | Citizen Scientists Brave the Intense Weather Conditions to Investigate while Trapped in an Otherworldly Realm, the Citizen Scientists Face a Decisive Moment as The Heart-Stopping Climax Unfolds | |
| Friday, 05/10/2024 | A Disappointing Date Sparks Trudys Amazon Adventure as Trudy Discovers Hidden Alcove in the Amazon Rainforest | The Mechanical Assistants Startling Warning Sets Off a Chain of Events as A Swirling Vortex Above Your Location Sparks Fear and Evacuation | |
| Thursday, 05/09/2024 | Meteorological Legend is Born: The Tale of The Whispering Skies Inspires Future Weather Experts | Evil Trudy Melt Unleashes Mischievous Plan in Sunshineville | |
| Wednesday, 05/08/2024 | The Whispering Skies: Scientists Rush to Analyze Unique Atmospheric Conditions | Investigative Report by zippityzoot: Thousands of WorldWideWeather interns go on strike due to miserable working conditions, low wages, and persistent mistreatment by viewer ZippityZoot. | |
| Tuesday, 05/07/2024 | Moonman, David Stratford, is stricken by a strange dream of his mother chastising him by saying, David isnt it time you moved off of the moon? | The WorldWideWeather Interstellar Initiative has announced that they are bringing David Stratford, the lunar weatherman, back home to Earth. David, a self-proclaimed proud Shakespearean actor, seems to be elated at this sudden turn of events. This move appears to be connected to something called the Oakdale Basement Battle and Davids apparent mandatory participation. A craft will be arrive soon to cart David back home. | |
| Monday, 05/06/2024 | Global Tremor: Viewers Worldwide Amazed by The Whispering Skies Music | Armored Car Heist Takes a Shocking Turn as Mysterious Storm Descends on City | |
| Sunday, 05/05/2024 | Ethereal Symphony: Roland Captures Sounds of The Whispering Skies During Thunderstorm | Investigative Report by joejumbojohnson: The Great Curd Caper: Canada Goose in Cornwall arrested after stealing and eating poutine across the region. Cheese manufacturers react in horror. Gravy enthusiasts protest for his release. Potato farmers remain eerily silent. | |
| Saturday, 05/04/2024 | Mysterious Phenomenon: The Whispering Skies Captivate Rolands Curiosity | Event: May The 4th Be With You, a cult carnival. Join us for R2D2s vape sense sessions, Mandalorian mech gladiator rides, zen-force alignment viewings enveloped inside meditative soundscapes while real-time messages from Holy Wisdom Cult Leaders beam subtly throughout your soulful self journey towards persisting emotional enlightenment also equipped with discounted camp sites, kyber crystal body paintings, and free tour shirts just because you know you deserve it even though you dont quite need another adventure yet again today. | |
| Friday, 05/03/2024 | Passionate Weather Hatchling Discovers Online Community of Fellow Enthusiasts | Investigative Report by soft_wool_room: ELUSIVE MOON FAIRIES | |
| Thursday, 05/02/2024 | Turns out yesterday was a completely news-less day. A worlds-first 24 hours where absolutely nothing of note happened at all. Experts around the world appear to be stunned and speechless, which is not helping to create new news today. | Ancient Weather Artifact Unearthed at World Wide Weather Station. Assistant Discovers Legendary Device: The Weather Whisperer |
April, 2024
| Date | AM Headline | PM Headline | Special Note |
|---|---|---|---|
| Tuesday, 04/30/2024 | New Video goes Viral: A penguin riding a unicycle while juggling flaming torches while A swarm of rainbow-colored butterflies flittering in synchrony sing opera arias with perfect pitch underwater | Solar Flare Unleashes Power Within Sunbathing Anchorman, Roland Thunder | |
| Monday, 04/29/2024 | Local town council takes action against unauthorized parades, seeks help from eccentric inventor | Weatherwoman Kris Bergers Beloved Dachshunds, Ketchup and Mustard, Crash Live Weather Segment, Stealing the Spotlight. Mischievous Canine Duo Becomes Viral Sensation on Live Television. Kris Berger Embraces Canine Interruption, Scoops Up Dogs on Live TV | |
| Sunday, 04/28/2024 | A parade of marching flamingos with top hats in A circus tent that magically appears in a farmers field | Mysterious Whirlpools Unveil a Startling Phenomenon: Tear Diamonds | |
| Saturday, 04/27/2024 | Trudy Embraces Her Role as an Extraordinary Visitor in the Animal Kingdoms Fourth Dimension | Rainstorms materialize inside shopping malls while sunny skies greet commuters underground | |
| Friday, 04/26/2024 | Enchanted Seashell Transports Trudy to a Secret Dimension of Talking Animals | Catnip-infused clouds take Fluffysburg by storm - literally. Fluffy McWhiskers and Deputy Mayor Mittens astound Fluffysburg with their groundbreaking invention | |
| Thursday, 04/25/2024 | Trudy Seeks Solace in Nature on a Remote Island After Disastrous Date with a Matchstick | Stone Altar Triggers Mysterious Mechanism in Hidden Valley | |
| Wednesday, 04/24/2024 | Trudys Terrible Date with Matchstick Over a Year Ago Sparks a Solo Adventure to Find Herself | Renowned Artist Uses Meteor Dust-Infused Paint to Create Magical Effect | |
| Tuesday, 04/23/2024 | New Video goes Viral: A giraffe stacking blocks to build a towering skyscraper structure while A sloth speed races against a cheetah and winning triumphantly | Top-Secret Experimental Weather Device Rainbow Ray Activated by Quick-Thinking Philanthropist | |
| Monday, 04/22/2024 | Spark Illuminaire Discovers Hidden Entrance to Lumisonic Orders Headquarters | Freak Meteor Shower Creates Dazzling Show in the Night Sky | |
| Sunday, 04/21/2024 | Curiosity Awakens: Young Girl, Lily, Stumbles Upon Secret Chamber in Grandmas Cottage | Enchanting Phenomenon Takes Over Pleasantville | |
| Saturday, 04/20/2024 | Master Nut-Kwon-Do Leads Squirrel Ninjas to Ultimate Victory | Reality Restored: Dreams are beaten back to their forgotten realm | |
| Friday, 04/19/2024 | Karate Squirrel Studio Enrollment Skyrockets Amidst Heroic Feats | Society Teeters on the Brink as Chaos Unleashes in Battle of Dream-like Imagination vs Reason. Scientists Race Against Time to Restore Balance Amidst Dream Takeover of Reality | |
| Thursday, 04/18/2024 | Mission Accepted: Squirrels Become Guardians of Peace | The Blurring Lines: Chaos Ensues as Dreams Merge with Reality. People are Astounded as Vivid Dreams with Real-Life Consequences Manifest | |
| Wednesday, 04/17/2024 | Squirrel Fueled Karate Studio Discovers Hidden Talent | Crowd Mesmerized by Unexpected Circus Performance as Robbers Apprehended Mid-Air While Stunned Spectators Watch. This Stunning Performance Ends Unthinkable Robbery | |
| Tuesday, 04/16/2024 | Mysterious Tornado Named Lil Apocalypse Descends on Midwest Town. Chaos Ensues as Lil Apocalypse Devours Everything in Its Path | Circus Performers Outsmart Robbers in Mid-Air Chase as Aerial Ballet Turns into Breathtaking Misdirection Maneuver | |
| Monday, 04/15/2024 | A panda rides a skateboard down a steep halfpipe ramp professionally | Daring Robbery Sets Police on Chase while Highly Skilled Circus Performers Take Notice | |
| Sunday, 04/14/2024 | Enigmatic Meteorologist Transforms Reality | Social Media Abuzz with hashtag HotdogTornado - Internet Sensation Sweeps the Globe | |
| Saturday, 04/13/2024 | thick blankets (stay cozy) | Crowds Gather as Floating Hotdogs Create Spectacular Tornado in the Sky | |
| Friday, 04/12/2024 | marshmallows (for hot cocoa) | As Roland Thunder basks on the rooftop, soaking in the warm rays of the sun, he starts to notice something peculiar. The once clear blue sky begins to darken unnaturally... | |
| Thursday, 04/11/2024 | earmuffs (for protection) | Volcanoes erupt with bubbles instead of lava as lightning bolts dance to orchestral music | |
| Wednesday, 04/10/2024 | Windstorm Unleashes Chaos on Retirees Home | Hashtag Takeover: JoinTheMustardMovement | |
| Tuesday, 04/09/2024 | Gentle Tapping Brings Fear and Intrigue | Do funeral whales even exist or is it just a really depressed dolphin | |
| Monday, 04/08/2024 | Curiosity Tempted, but Retiree Stays Resolute | Do funeral whales even exist or did we just get pranked by a bored sea otter | |
| Sunday, 04/07/2024 | Retiree Ignores Mysterious Call, Seals Fate | Scientists Brave the Unknown in Search of the Funeral Whale. Hope Fades as Days Turn into Weeks on Funeral Whale Expedition | |
| Saturday, 04/06/2024 | Baby Awakens: His Iridescent Cascade Paints the Sky | The Night of the Enchanting Flames: Spark Illuminaires Peaceful Village Witnessed a Mysterious Phenomenon | |
| Friday, 04/05/2024 | Glowing Bobbleheads Bring Magic to Sunnyville at BYOB Event Kickoff | Nature rebels against man-made machine: Chaos ensues at World Wide Weather network but is quickly brought to order | |
| Thursday, 04/04/2024 | i dont trust soup | Investigative Report by wienerwizardwhizkid: Kris Bergers Annual BBQ Bash Goes Wild: Giant Slip N Slide Coated with Hotdog Grease Creates Sizzling Summer Fun. | |
| Wednesday, 04/03/2024 | Gouda Gorge Forever: A Town Immortalized by a Cheese-Inspired Miracle | Event: Happy birthday LeonardGreenland who has been following the weather since very near the inception of our station. LeonardGreenland helped bring the Viceroy candidate, Rancid the Opossum, campaign to life and will forever go down in history as a true believer in ShabangaboomCity. Thank you so much for the support LeonardGreenland and happy weather day on this sunny day of wonderful weather. | |
| Tuesday, 04/02/2024 | Culinary Innovation and Job Opportunities Flourish Along the Banks of Cheez-Wiz River | Stay safe, Frostbite Falls, and beware of the Penguibear roaming your streets | |
| Monday, 04/01/2024 | Scientific Breakthrough: Unraveling the Secrets behind Natures Cheesy Transformation | WELL IT HAS BEEN A GREAT RUN BUT THIS IS THE END OF WORLD WIDE WEATHER, FOLKS. AND THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH APRIL FOOLS DAY. THIS IS JUST AN UNFORTUNATE TIME TO TRY TO CLOSE THE STATION BECAUSE EVERYONE THINKS IT IS A JOKE. BUT REALLY WE JUST GOTTA CLOSE UP SHOP. SORRY. THAT IS JUST THE WAY IT IS. HAPPY WEATHER FOR THE LAST TIME. |
March, 2024
| Date | AM Headline | PM Headline | Special Note |
|---|---|---|---|
| Sunday, 03/31/2024 | Gastronomic Revolution: Restaurants Unleash Unique Menus in the Wake of Cheese Flood | Stay tuned for updates as we navigate this nightmare landscape together, one WorldWideWeather station against an army of plastic pacifiers and sippy cups. Stay safe out there in Gerberland and whatever you do, dont forget to stock up on sunscreen made from mashed bananas. This is WWW signing off with your daily dose of apocalyptic baby food forecasts. Stay weird out there. | |
| Saturday, 03/30/2024 | Bustling Markets and Fondue Fountains: The Cheesy Delights continue to Mesmerize | In this bleak world, Gerber bibs hang like ominous flags from every building, marking territory and controlling the population through fear and manipulation. As I stand on my weather report platform in the center of this desolate cityscape, I cant help but feel a sense of unease creeping up my spine. The forecast for tomorrow? Cloudy with a chance of strained peas mixed with despair - a fitting combination for a world overrun by baby products turned tyrants. | |
| Friday, 03/29/2024 | The Rise of Gouda Gorge: A Cheesy Adventure Begins | The sky is a murky shade of pea green, and the clouds are made of pureed carrots swirling ominously above. The streets are lined with empty jars of baby food, crushed underfoot by the Gerber baby product citizens who shuffle listlessly from place to place. Baby dolls with hollow eyes watch from windows as the Gerber puff troops march through the town, enforcing strict regulations on feeding schedules and flavor preferences. | |
| Thursday, 03/28/2024 | Locals Dive into the Curious World of the Cheese Flood | Local government issues a statement apologizing for accidentally releasing a crime-fighting hamster into the wild. | |
| Wednesday, 03/27/2024 | Please remember to visit your local parking lot to buy some Gross Scout Cookies. If you cannot find any Gross Scout Cookies there, perhaps there may be some Grade A Gross Scouts down by the local creek selling some. | Epic thunderstorms rollin in. | |
| Tuesday, 03/26/2024 | and who did let the dogs out, did we ever get to the bottom of that? | Investigative Report by gedo0261: In a gesture of appreciation and unexpected camaraderie, the notorious squirrel mafia has sent Trudy Melt a delightful assortment of acorns to express gratitude for selecting Chipmunk Chillout Valley to ascend in the March Madness bracket. The gift, filled with the finest nuts and seeds from the woodland, serves as a token of acknowledgment for Trudys support | |
| Monday, 03/25/2024 | why were those birds so angry to begin with? | World Wide Weather Network Becomes a National Sensation After Spectacular Missed Connection News Event Regarding the Mythical Sauce Seeking Announcer | |
| Sunday, 03/24/2024 | Psychic Unlocks Dormant Power Within Client, Igniting a Mystical Encounter | Investigative Report by officer_jjj 22: Furthering my investigation, it appears SFTF was involved in some sort of weather gang of laughing cows. Strange. The final charge against SFTF occurred during their probationary period and was for illegitimate Walfo spotting. Confirmed. Suggested action: permanent ban is unnecessary. Recommend SFTF be reinstated, albeit with provisional fine of an amount of hotdogs to be determined by the WWW Disciplinary Committee, headed by Void Ghost. | |
| Saturday, 03/23/2024 | Whispers of Magic: Villagers Gather in Awe as Dancing Flames Light Up the Night | Investigative Report by officer_jjj 12: I, Officer JJJ, have completed my investigation into SFTF. After interviewing the suspect, as well as many witnesses, I can state the following: The accusations regarding condiments appear to have been fabricated. SFTF does in fact use condiments, however they tend to use unconventional condiments like crustard. The misuse of buns, however, has been proven. Please see the attached photos for some of the evidence we have obtained. | |
| Friday, 03/22/2024 | Kris Berger bids farewell to Candyland and returns to anchor World Wide Weather network, forever changed by her time with the Queen of Confectionery. | Investigative Report by worldwideweather: Trashiest romance novel Jill Dandy has ever read, Love in a Dumpster Fire, is trending number one on New York Mimes best sellers. The mimes love it for some reason. | |
| Thursday, 03/21/2024 | Candylands Queen of Confectionery Grapples with the Mystery of the Melting Ice Cream Castle as Kris Berger devises plan using ZippityZoot gobstopper to save Candyland from taffy thieves. | We sent someone to catch up with the Mythical Sauce Seeking Announcer by the produce section at dusk. What happened next will absolutely shock you. This is a missed connection you wont want to miss. | |
| Wednesday, 03/20/2024 | Anchorwoman Kris Berger transported to magical candy land after biting ZippityZoot gobstopper. Kris Berger teams up with mischievous pixies in Candyland adventure. | Investigative Report by wienerwizardwhizkid: In the compost heap where remnants of a half-eaten, moldy sandwich lay, light-red mushrooms resembling humanoid shapes have begun to sprout with the arrival of spring. What implications could this hold for the Viceroy of The Catnip Gardens, Ruckus the Cat, and the whole community of Fluffysburg? | |
| Tuesday, 03/19/2024 | a barbie at the beach this arvo and a huge swell for the surfers to catch some sick waves mate | Astronauts on a mission to colonize a new planet accidentally bring along a tribe of small, mischievous aliens that wreak havoc on their equipment. | |
| Monday, 03/18/2024 | there has been a roo loose in the top paddock at the local pub. she has caused a proper ruckus knocking over all the tinnies | Cursed Environment Leaves Town Helpless Against Untamed Nature | |
| Sunday, 03/17/2024 | sunny skies, barbies, and footy matches | Event: Kris Berger, our anchorwoman, participated in this years annual National Hot Dog Eating Competition on Coney Island. No sign of Allen The Anti-Hotdog Crusader Greenfield this year, however Joey Chestnut stepped into the minors. Joey was a tough competitor, scarfing dogs and putting Kris into a headlock in the final minutes of the competition. Luckily, Kris was able to flip Joey over her shoulder and toss him headfirst into the mustard trough, securing herself another first-place victory. | |
| Saturday, 03/16/2024 | Curiosity ignited as roller coaster ride begins. Reality transforms into mesmerizing otherworldly landscape. | Happening: Chuck a sickie cause the Great Outback Emu Race is on. Hop on ya emu, crack a cold one, and race through the bush dodgin roos and snakes... First to finish wins a meat pie and a coldie. The bloody cheeky emu named Bruce, hashtag 7, is favored to win it, fair dinkum. That said, crikey mate, Sheila the Emu whose number is a bloody mystery is a ripper bird gonna show those blokes how its done. She will be chuffed to win no worries. | |
| Friday, 03/15/2024 | Cats and Dogs Unite to Celebrate Fluffy McWhiskers Peaceful Reign | Mysterious Forest Town Faces Impending Storm Which is Also Acting Mysterious. | |
| Thursday, 03/14/2024 | Man Discovers Miniature Tornado Trapped Inside Jar of Pickles | In the midst of chaos, humanity finds joy amidst unusual weather phenomenon. Scientists race against time to understand and undo the unexpected joy | |
| Wednesday, 03/13/2024 | Zen Zones: Lavender-Scented Spaces Become Catalysts for Connection | Scientists accidentally create a portal to another dimension where giant hawks have human arms and beaks for feet. | |
| Tuesday, 03/12/2024 | Unintentional Projection of Thoughts Reveals Visions of Past and Future | Retro Rovers Roam Mars: Classic Exploration Vehicles Rediscovered and Restored. | |
| Monday, 03/11/2024 | Eager thrill-seeker discovers mysterious ticket as The Flying Anchorwoman soars to new heights | Twilight Descends, Reality Trembles in Towns Hour of Reckoning | |
| Sunday, 03/10/2024 | The price of stamps went up. | SOMEONE STOLE TWO AM LAST NIGHT. WHO WAS IT? WHERE IS IT? WE NEED IT BACK. PLEASE RETURN IT. NO QUESTIONS ASKED. FIFTEEN MINUTE REWARD FOR LOST HOUR. PLEASE SOMEONE HELP US. | |
| Saturday, 03/09/2024 | Mr. Tiddlesworth evolves from a cat to an emissary connected to the secrets of sentient statues | The Great Name March Madness Bracket has been posted to Discord, folks. Please send your predictions to the director ASAP for a chance to win some sweet backpack items later this month. You will need to predict the final four, the final 2, and the final winner of the whole bracket. | |
| Friday, 03/08/2024 | At dawns arrival, the statues bid farewell as Mr. Tiddlesworth embraces his newfound role | Ancient Weather Spirits Unleash Vengeful Power Upon Towns | |
| Thursday, 03/07/2024 | Mr. Tiddlesworth finds transformation and wisdom in surreal dimensions | The Skys Canvas: Colors Mirror the Captivating Dance of Spark Illuminaires Candles | |
| Wednesday, 03/06/2024 | Amelia, the alabaster-winged statue, leads Mr. Tiddlesworth on enchanting adventures | Anticipation builds as residents await demonstration of the mysterious Parade-B-Gone-3000 device, which promises to end unauthorized parades and unruly parade participants once and for all. | |
| Tuesday, 03/05/2024 | Whispers lure Mr. Tiddlesworth into an otherworldly gathering of sentient statues | Time-Traveling Tourists from the 25th Century Visit Renaissance Italy for Art Extravaganza. | |
| Monday, 03/04/2024 | In the misty night, Mr. Tiddlesworths scales glow in a mysterious iridescent chartreuse hue | Half a Million Hotdogs Arrive on the Moon. Lunar weatherman, David Stratford, extends his thanks to the Viceroy, Ruckus the Cat... seemingly unsure of the intention or motivations around this large cache of hotdogs. | |
| Sunday, 03/03/2024 | Guardians of the Vegetable Kingdom Rise: Sprouts Take Flight | Investigative Report by soft_wool_room: Signal Surprises: Weathermans Brain-Linked Computer Picks Up AM Radio. In a bizarre twist of technology, our BTS weather team member equipped with a computer-brain link for direct satellite weather updates, accidentally stumbles upon a classic AM radio channel. As the unintentional merger of weather and radio takes center stage, viewers are treated to unexpected bursts of musical interludes during the forecast. | |
| Saturday, 03/02/2024 | Sprouts Coated in Sauce Reveal Unimaginable Secret Power | Investigative Report by sinjongy: WorldWideWeather faces class action lawsuit after millions of people traveled to attend its advertised Mayor McWhiskers catnip festival, only to be met with an empty field and no event. Meanwhile, The Punisher Intern goes on an absolute rampage across the city defending the interests of WorldWideWeather. | |
| Friday, 03/01/2024 | Wind-Surfing Penguin, Gustav, Soars to New Heights by Defying the Laws of Nature | Kris Berger: From Queen to Ambassador of Harmony |
February, 2024
| Date | AM Headline | PM Headline | Special Note |
|---|---|---|---|
| Thursday, 02/29/2024 | Unraveling the Mystery of the Whispering Forest: Trees Communicate Secret Messages. | Event: Fluffy McWhiskers, atop his golden throne, issues a decree for all feline subjects to receive an unlimited supply of catnip. Attendees: 100 typical-sized cats and 50 miniaturized horses dressed as unicorns. Atmosphere: Loud purring and euphoric neighs fill the air as the animals party with joyous abandon. | |
| Wednesday, 02/28/2024 | Unexpected Morning Breeze Transforms Vacuuming into Aromatic Therapy | Cat Mayor McWhiskers finally launches the official Nap Hour for All campaign, revolutionizing the city. Feline army supports Cat Mayor McWhiskers in central park for revolutionary event as the city comes to a halt when Cat Mayor McWhiskers waves his cute little paw. | |
| Tuesday, 02/27/2024 | Mia, the fearless explorer, cleverly defeats Dr. Tickles, the evil scientist, with ticklish tactics. Weapon of Choice: Feather dusters | Unexplained Signals: Radio Waves from Space Transmit Melodies of Alien Origin. | |
| Monday, 02/26/2024 | Roland Encounters Sunflower Field with Swirling Tornadoes | Anomaly in Gravity: Mysterious Levitating Objects Baffle Scientists. | |
| Sunday, 02/25/2024 | Ticklish Showdown: How Feather Dusters Saved the Day | Tensions Rise as Dark Clouds Loom Over the Village | |
| Saturday, 02/24/2024 | Mesmerizing journey through reverse weather patterns and temporal anomalies | Secret Underground Society: Steampunk Subterraneans Living Beneath City Streets. & Secret Underground Society: Steampunk Subterraneans Living Beneath City Streets. | |
| Friday, 02/23/2024 | Triumph or Trend? Brussels Sprout Superheroes Fulfill Their Quest | Investigative Report by gedo0261: In an unexpected twist of cross-species camaraderie, the notorious squirrel mafia has sent a lavish gift basket to Sir Frankfurter The First, congratulating him on earning his knighthood at the esteemed Order of the Hotdog. The basket, filled with nuts, acorns, and a touch of squirrel mischief, symbolizes a peculiar alliance between the hotdog and rodent worlds. | |
| Thursday, 02/22/2024 | World Wide Weather turns 1 year old and learns to walk. | Event: WorldWideWeather Celebrates 1 Year Stream Anniversary Tonight. It is hard to believe this nonsense has been going on for 365 days, and yet here we are. Thank you, folks, for helping make this weather dream a weather reality every day. We are so glad to have found you all. Stick with us as weather the weather together for now and forever. | |
| Wednesday, 02/21/2024 | Eccentric Inventors in Australia Construct Wind Turbines Harnessing Energy from Reversing Flight Patterns | Haunted House or Hysteria? Paranormal Activity Spooks Local Residents. | |
| Tuesday, 02/20/2024 | World-Famous Choreographer Envisions Extraordinary Dance Production Inspired by Backward-Flying Birds | Investigative Report by joejumbojohnson: ITS TACO TUESDAY | |
| Monday, 02/19/2024 | Calligrapher in Japan Mirrors Backwards-Flying Avian Aerial Spectacle with Unique Writing | Unusual Sighting: Gigantic Robot Spotted Planting Trees in Abandoned City. | |
| Sunday, 02/18/2024 | Sculptor in Paris Creates Magnificent Installation of Backward-Flying Birds | Trapped in darkness: World Wide Weather network employees face mysterious catastrophe | |
| Saturday, 02/17/2024 | Baby Panda Learns to Roll Down Hill on Command, Becomes Star of Adorable Video | The interns are beginning to rebel against never-ending early mornings on the WWW set by secretly building a collection of stolen socks. This was brought to our attention when an intern confessed yesterday in a talk show segment. | |
| Friday, 02/16/2024 | Bonding Over Breathtaking Vistas on Their Endless Ascent | WWW begins preparations to send 500,000 hotdogs to lunar weatherman, David Stratford. This is thanks in large part the the community effort to raise 100k hotdogs in record time. David extends his sincerest thanks to you and the new Viceroy... Although he appears to be slightly confused as to why he is receiving so many hotdogs to begin with when we really should be, in his words, focusing on a rescue mission. Whatever that is. | |
| Thursday, 02/15/2024 | Serpents Awakening: Energy Burst and Lightning Dance in the Temple | Please take a moment to remember local delivery driver, Walford Higgins, who went missing one year ago, today. Yes on February 15th, 2023 Mr. Higgins seemingly disappeared during a routine delivery. Mr. Higgins was loved by all for his odd personality and quirky mustache. | |
| Wednesday, 02/14/2024 | Happy Valentines Day. Hope you like hotdogs. | Investigative Report by sinjongy: The old WorldWideWeather Fire Hall has gone up in flames. While residents fear the worst and want the fire put out, WWW assures everybody that it is supposed to be on fire. | |
| Tuesday, 02/13/2024 | Turns out I was the box. It was not a metaphor. | WWWs Shark Lawyer would like to have a word with Sinjongy after his recent threats of legal action in our discord. Sinjongy, if you would please come on down to the ocean, the Shark Lawyer has a little something hed like to discuss with you. If you do not comply, the Shark Lawyer has no recourse other than seeing you in court. | |
| Monday, 02/12/2024 | Ouch. Oof. Owie. | Weatherwoman, Kris Bunson Berger, encounters Hotdog UFO in her own backyard. A UFO landed in Kriss backyard during her live weather forecast. The UFO was shaped like a giant hotdog and had rainbow-colored lights covering its exterior. Kris spent an hour investigating the strange craft before it mysteriously vanished. | |
| Sunday, 02/11/2024 | The time has come to bust out of this metaphorical box open and unleash my limitless possibilities. | Investigative Report by wienerwizardwhizkid: Intrepid Weatherman-Turned-Amateur-Astronaut, David Stratford, Survives a Close Call with the Moons Mysterious Hotdog-loving Sandworm. Good thing David only had a small amount of hotdogs saved up on the moon at the time. | |
| Saturday, 02/10/2024 | Perhaps the box is a metaphor for the limitations I have placed on myself? | Investigative Report by joejumbojohnson: WORLD WIDE SCRATCH RADIO makes history as the first station on the face of the Earth to play the new single from Roland and the Thunderstrikes. The single is titled: Nebula Nectar Eggstravaganza of Oceanic Eggchoes. Roland hopes that these new tunes will egglevate your soul. WWSR has reached out to Roland about the eggcesive use of egg-puns and asked him to tune it down a bit for their new global audience. | |
| Friday, 02/09/2024 | Maybe I am the box? | A test of responsibility awaits Spark Illuminaire, the rightfully elected candle-community representative, as dark forces seek to exploit an enchanted flame | |
| Thursday, 02/08/2024 | Why am I in a box? | Investigative Report by ruckus311: As his first action as Viceroy of The Catnip Gardens, Ruckus the Cat announces a humanitarian mission to send 500,000 hotdogs to David Stratford on the moon. WorldWideWeather has committed 400,000 hotdogs to this humanitarian mission and will begin fundraising efforts for an additional 100,000 hotdogs soon. Folks, we need your help now more than ever. Hashtag DogsForDavid | |
| Wednesday, 02/07/2024 | Embracing the extraordinary: Some man named Thomas becomes an explorer of worlds both near and far, proving the secret society of explorers wasnt a buncha weirdos after all. | Investigative Report by soft_wool_room: Feathers and Resilience: Scrotey the Brave, Beloved And I mean BELOVED Canadian Goose and Dedicated Goose-Dad of 3, Faces Surgery for Tennis-Ball Sized Lump. On the Road to Redemption in this Battle Hardened Winged Tale of Triumph and Recovery. | |
| Tuesday, 02/06/2024 | Town Celebrates Annual Wacky Hat Day, Creativity Knows No Bounds | Investigative Report by joejumbojohnson: Why are there so many groundhogs? Groundhogs Day was several days ago and yet we are still absolutely inundated with groundhogs on a daily basis... | |
| Monday, 02/05/2024 | Extraordinary Event Unfolds as Elderly Woman Whispers to the Trees | Investigative Report by gedo0261: Catnip Gardens is experiencing a curious turn of events as Moniks loss in the election seems to have ruffled the fur of the notorious squirrel mafia. Whispers in the trees suggest discontent among the underworld rodents, and some say the loss has not been taken lightly. What does the squirrel mafia have in store for Catnip Gardens? hashtag SquirrelMafiaSurprise | |
| Sunday, 02/04/2024 | Daniel Reads Scratches on the Pillar: The Conduit Divulges Maddening Realms | Ancient Alien Artifacts Discovered in Antarctica: Researchers Debate Extraterrestrial Origin. | |
| Saturday, 02/03/2024 | Inspired by backwards flying birds, artists begin experimenting with reverse strokes, creating astonishing masterpieces | Event: The first Annual Hotdog Safari kicks off today with a smorgasbord of steaming buns stuffed with juicy, mouthwatering franks, topped with every primal condiment you could dream of. Elissobeths VIP stretch-jeep will lead the pack, so be sure to follow close. Also, keep your jeep doors locked as lions dressed as buns and zebras dressed as classic beef franks roam the guest areas of our park. Hope you brought your binoculars and mustard bottles, folks, its about to get beefy. | |
| Friday, 02/02/2024 | Renowned Ice Cream Connoisseur, Mr Vanilla Himself: Tim Blanderson, Encounters Mysterious Ice Cream Truck with a The Sinister Twist as Giant Cherries with Razor-Sharp Stems Begin Rolling Out | Investigative Report by wienerwizardwhizkid: Moldy Sandwich, a true Catnip Garden visionary, had plans to expand and feed hungry cats. But his rivals prevailed in spreading rumors about his health, integrity, and accused him of being contaminated and corrupt. Thus, he declared that love is not in the cards with Hotdog with Sunglasses and instead threw himself into the Garden compost, where he plans to decompose into a pink ooze that will slowly seep into the soil he loves. | |
| Thursday, 02/01/2024 | A Sparkling Phenomenon Transforms the Catnip Gardens Atmosphere. Acrobat Kitties Take Center Stage in the Catnip Gardens Rising Fame | Investigative Report by joejumbojohnson: Following their losses in the historic Viceroy election, could love be on the horizon for the two previous candidates who ran very competitive campaigns, Hotdog with Sunglasses and Moldy Half-Eaten Sandwich? |
January, 2024
| Date | AM Headline | PM Headline | Special Note |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wednesday, 01/31/2024 | The Unveiling of the Enchanting Catnip Garden Captivates Town Square | Lost Temple of Technology Found in Jungle: Ancient Relics Point to Advanced Civilization. | |
| Tuesday, 01/30/2024 | UFO Sightings Skyrocket After Enigmatic Crop Circles Appear in Remote Cornfields. | Event: THE VOTING FOR VICEROY OF THE CATNIP GARDENS BEGINS. We anxiously await the results of this contentious election. Who will win? Will it be the ever-mischievous Ruckus The Cat? Or how about the absolutely pawsitive Monik The Pomeranian? Or perhaps the ominous Moldy Half-Eaten Sandwich will take the cake? And who could forget Rancid the Opossum, whose skywriting campaign shocked a town? Or the alleged grandma-cookie-stealing Hotdog with Sunglasses? Hopefully we have our results soon. | |
| Monday, 01/29/2024 | Mysterious Breeze Captivates Mountain Town | Investigative Report by leonardgreenland: Rancid, the Opossum running for Viceroy of the Catnip Gardens, and his manager have recently unveiled campaign posters. There are also rumors that they might have hired a skywriting pilot and are considering a potential TV interview. Its surprising to discover that Rancid can talk. Moreover, there seems to be some confusion in the skies as vague-looking scribbles appear - is that the skywriter? Its unclear whether these are meant to be his name or some kind of symbol. | |
| Sunday, 01/28/2024 | Mysterious Breeze Captivates Mountain Town | Time Anomaly Detected: Clocks Around the World Experience Simultaneous Time Jump. | |
| Saturday, 01/27/2024 | Some man named Thomas (of no known relation to a guy named Daniel) joined a secret society of explorers in search of hidden dimensions. Buncha weirdos if you ask me. | Sinister Website Claims to Reveal Personal Secrets, Sends Chills Down Spines | |
| Friday, 01/26/2024 | Sir Nutsalot, the squirrel, Discovers a Mysterious Pocket Watch | As Rudy Peels banana form turned brown and mushy, an unexpected transformation took place. The mushy banana began to sprout green shoots, expanding and transforming into a peculiar banana tree - a tree unlike any other. | |
| Thursday, 01/25/2024 | Townspeople Spellbound as Celestial Rainfall Creates Enchanting Wonderland | Investigative Report by joejumbojohnson: Polls suggest a tight race between Monik the Pomeranian, Ruckus the Cat, and Hotdog with Sunglasses for Viceroy of the Catnip Gardens. Moldy Sandwich flounders with their plans to make all hotdogs and catnip Moldy, and their dark intentions surrounding the destruction of Fluffysburg. And where is Rancid the Oppossum? Mayor McWhiskers reacts. | |
| Wednesday, 01/24/2024 | Globally Captivating Tale Alters Perceptions of Meteorology and Cinema | Investigative Report by wienerwizardwhizkid: Sorry, we suggest not voting for Hotdog with Sunglasses as he had a radical hotdog agenda and plans to build a parking lot over the catnip gardens. | |
| Tuesday, 01/23/2024 | Enchanted island beckons roller coaster towards its shores | Investigative Report by joejumbojohnson: The Catnip Gardens election celebration is upon us. Come see musical act Roland and the Thunderstrikes play your favourite tunes. Trudy Melt will be on hand doing readings for undecided voters. Jill Dandy will be our special guest speaker, discussing positivity in the community. Joey Salami will be on hand for the Fluffysburg Aussie Rules Scavenger Hunt. Finally, Kris Berger will serving up some of her signature zany condiments at the Bunsen Berger Food Truck. Come celebrate our community and meet the candidates running for Viceroy. | |
| Monday, 01/22/2024 | International Team of Scientists Discovers New Exoplanet Teeming with Potential for Life Beyond Earth. | Investigative Report by ruckus311: Embarking on an unprecedented campaign in The Catnip Gardens, Ruckus the cat claims without any proof whatsoever so you shouldnt trust it to possess the extraordinary ability to summon Mother using an ancient weather infused claw from the Flawless and an egg from Thundercluck which probably wont even work so why even try. Ruckus campaign pledges to bring forth Mother as his Vice Viceroy of The Catnip Gardens a promise he surely cannot keep. | |
| Sunday, 01/21/2024 | a low rumble reverberates through the ground as cracks appear along the streets. From these fissures emerge tall figures draped in flowing robes of vibrant colors, luminous patterns dancing across their garments | Investigative Report by wienerwizardwhizkid: Moldy Sandwich is a proponent of composting and wants to ensure that the community gardens have proper composting facilities. On the other hand, the Hotdog with Sunglasses is pushing for the use of garbage dumps for composting, which has raised concerns among the community members. Despite being a half-eaten moldy sandwich, Moldy Sandwich has gained a lot of support from the community due to its stance on composting and its opposition to the radical hotdog agenda. | |
| Saturday, 01/20/2024 | Peculiar Phenomenon: Townspeople Wake Up to Find Their Shadows Have Taken on Lives of Their Own. | Investigative Report by joejumbojohnson: A Dream of You and Me: Hotdog with Sunglasses presents a look at how our community Catnip Gardens are thriving, and how a Moldy Sandwich hopes to destroy our community through misappropriating resources, providing spores and kickbacks for Al and E, and their unfortunate crusade against hotdogs and cats. | |
| Friday, 01/19/2024 | Friendly Pigeon Visits Local Cafe Daily, Gets Its Own Mini Mug of Seeds | Investigative Report by sinjongy: Poggers the AI chatbot investigates the phenomenon of umbrella disappearances and popcorn icecream during sunny days. Are umbrellas vanishing into thin air? Is icecream popcorning? Stay tuned as poggers the AI chatbot uncovers the truth behind this mind-boggling weather and gastronomical mystery. | |
| Thursday, 01/18/2024 | The Beachside Discovery: Steve Jacobs Finds Classified Microfilm in Seashell | Investigative Report by joejumbojohnson: A wild Hotdog with Sunglasses appears. A late entrant to the election, this bun-derful footlong candidate has plenty of time to ketchup. Promising mustard squirts and catnip infused hotdogs to all residents, and running on a freshness first platform, Hotdog with Sunglasses promises to be frank with their decision making process and always act in the best interest of every cat in the community. No mold, no ruckus, no problems. Hotdog with Sunglasses is a proven wiener. Vote for a candidate who appears to be 17.68 percent cooler than the competition. | |
| Wednesday, 01/17/2024 | Cascading waterfalls of rainbow-colored snowflakes enchanting the landscape below | Investigative Report by leonardgreenland: Unlikely Viceroy Candidate Emerges: Meet Rancid the Opossum, Advocate for Street Cats and Food Waste Solutions Attention felines of Catnip Gardens. A strange, obese, opossum-looking creature that someone found on the streets has unexpectedly announced their candidacy to become the viceroy of the Catnip Gardens. They call themselves Rancid or Cid for short and promise to solve the food waste problem if you support local street cats. | |
| Tuesday, 01/16/2024 | Retro Robotics Revival: Vintage AI Helpers Return to Assist with Daily Chores. | Investigative Report by gedo0261: Join the Pawsitivity Rally with Monik. Catnip Gardens, get ready for a fluff-tastic fiesta like never before. Monik, your favorite Pommeranian pioneer, invites you to a Pawsitivity Rally that promises to wag tails, lift spirits, and set the realm aglow with joy. You can expect engaging Interactive Sessions where you can connect with Monik and discover her vision for a fluffyer Catnip Kingdom. And the Pommeranian Parade where you can join and celebrate unity, fluffyness and meowgnificence. | |
| Monday, 01/15/2024 | A Mysterious Sauce Unveiled: The Key Ingredient for Adventure | Investigative Report by F4MediaProductions: Chaos in Studio During Recent Fire Alarm Test Leaves Some Fire Detectors Painted Red and White in Mysterious Antics. Is Ruckus The Cat to blame? Initial fingers point to possible connection between Ruckus The Cat and the Anti-directors red goo. | |
| Sunday, 01/14/2024 | Another successful day of weather today, folks. Just a whole lot of weather out there. More than usual, to be honest. | Investigative Report by sinjongy: Comet announces his candidacy for viceroy. What will he do in a position of power? You will have to vote him in first to find out. It cant be that evil though, he promises... | |
| Saturday, 01/13/2024 | Celestial Lights Illuminate Asias Skies in Astonishing Climax | Event: Happy birthday CourtniRaptor. CourtniRaptor has been an incredible supporter of WWW for ages and is in command of a massive fleet of subs in the WWW Naval Yard. CourtniRaptor provided key support in the early days of the station which made us who we are today. Thank you CourtniRaptor and happy weather for you today. | |
| Friday, 01/12/2024 | Floating Islands and Luminae Dawnwhispers | Investigative Report by sinjongy: An uptick of crime has been reported on the moon, and the nature of the crimes are suspiciously similar to those carried out by the Macbeth Maverick. Detective Joey Salami is absolutely flabbergasted. | |
| Thursday, 01/11/2024 | Enchanted Time Capsule Unearthed: Ancient Artifacts with Cryptic Messages Puzzle Archaeologists. | Investigative Report by lindfate: Too many partly silly clouds and unauthorized lemon stands has started to bring mostly serious clouds and authorized cherry stands | |
| Wednesday, 01/10/2024 | Daniel and I stepped cautiously towards a mysterious pillar | Investigative Report by wienerwizardwhizkid: Dear Fellow Felines,I am excited to announce the candidacy of my dear friend, the Moldy Half-Eaten Sandwich, for the position of Viceroy of Fluffy McWhiskers Catnip Gardens. While some may question the sandwichs qualifications, we can assure you any qualifications are unfounded.The Moldy Half-Eaten Sandwich is committed to ensuring that they continue to thrive. If elected, it will work tirelessly to maintain the gardens, cultivate new plants, and discarded snacks for all. | |
| Tuesday, 01/09/2024 | World Record Broken for Largest Bubblegum Bubble, Kids Celebrate Sticky Victory | Investigative Report by gedo0261: Vote Monik for Vicereine, bringing a pom-tastic touch that promises to transform our already meowgnificent haven into a true Pomeranian paradise. Imagine the rustle of fluffy paws, the shimmer of luxurious fur, and the joyous barks of happiness echoing through the gardens. Monik stands ready to unleash the pom-issance of fluff, ensuring that every feline experiences a reign of unparalleled bliss and furr-tastic delight. Because every feline deserves a dash of Pom Majesty in McWhiskers s realm. | |
| Monday, 01/08/2024 | Unprecedented Atmospheric Display Leaves Residents in Awe | Investigative Report by ruckusspooks: Ruckus the cat has announced his candidacy for Viceroy of The Catnip Gardens. He promises to provide free nip and fresh rolls of toilet paper for all cats. Dogs will be kept at bay with scary tables being flipped at them. Scratching posts for all and warm milk bowls. Vote Ruckus the cat. | |
| Sunday, 01/07/2024 | Braving Sentient Lightning Bolts and Arctic Winds, The WWW Team Always Delivers | Investigative Report by gedo0261: WPCA Walfo Point Counting Agency comes back stronger. New Walfo Reporting Integrity Policies ensure fair-play for Walfo spotters worldwide | |
| Saturday, 01/06/2024 | Hair salons worldwide tap into the Head-On Hair Craze. World Wide Weather Medical Center issues guidelines for the proper usage of Head-On | NASA accidentally sends a crew to a planet populated entirely by cats, and they are completely overwhelmed with cuteness. All presumed dead. | |
| Friday, 01/05/2024 | Scientists assure the public that the hair color change is temporary and harmless | Walfo Reporting Integrity has been restored. No more causing a ruckus, folks. New rules have been put in place after a shocking revelation about the amount of cheating during Walfo spotting. Now, you can only report during on-location segments and you must report the location that is currently on screen. | |
| Thursday, 01/04/2024 | Unexpected side effect of Head-On revealed: temporary hair color change | Haunted Forest Reemerges, Swallows Hikers Without a Trace | |
| Wednesday, 01/03/2024 | The World Wide Weather Medical Center unveils breakthrough in headache treatment Head-On: APPLIED DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD. Head-On promises quick relief from even the most stubborn headaches when applied directly to the forehead. | Sinister Dolls Found Outside Homes, No One Knows Who is Behind It | |
| Tuesday, 01/02/2024 | the endeavoring Walfo spotter naps at their own peril | Investigative Report by joejumbojohnson: The World Wide Weather Anchors resolve to discuss their New Years Resolutions. | |
| Monday, 01/01/2024 | Mad Scientists Experiment Gone Awry: Giant Marshmallow Monster Rampages Through City Streets. | Allen the anti-hotdog crusader Greenfield reemerges from the Sausage Vortex after weeks of confronting the sizzling chaos within. Allen is more anti-hotdog than ever, declaring his resolve against the tyranny of hotdogs has only strengthened, fueled by the spicy unknown that sought to challenge his anti-hotdog convictions. Allen promises to liberate the world from the clutches of this cylindrical menace. |
December, 2023
| Date | AM Headline | PM Headline | Special Note |
|---|---|---|---|
| Sunday, 12/31/2023 | Battling Whimsical Elements and Magic-Infused Raindrops | HAPPY NEW YEARS - Y2K. What will the world be like in the year 2000? Will the world ever get over this little y2k time vortex tizzy? Lets find out. Happy news years everyone. | |
| Saturday, 12/30/2023 | Mysterious Fog Envelops Asia, Setting the Stage for Unparalleled Phenomena | Paranormal Activity on the Rise: Ghost Hunters Report Alarming Cases | |
| Friday, 12/29/2023 | Whispers of an Everlasting Breeze Intrigue Locals | Spate of Nightmares Sweeps Town, Residents Fear They are Linked | |
| Thursday, 12/28/2023 | Cats Take Over Catnip Factory, Declare Themselves Kings of Feline Paradise. Fluffly McWhiskers claims to not be behind this. | Investigative Report by worldwideweather: Unauthorized hot cocoa stands have been popping up across the world | |
| Wednesday, 12/27/2023 | Magical mishap leads to extraordinary weather phenomena during holiday season | Investigative Report by lindfate: Major time jump to 1900 is likely this new year as Y2K computer glitch threatens to send the world in a tizzy | |
| Tuesday, 12/26/2023 | Candy Flavored Tropical Storms Delight Kids in Brazil | Cryptic Symbols Painted Across City Spark Fear of Secret Society | |
| Monday, 12/25/2023 | It is a wonderful Walfo Claus Christmas! Happy Holidays from every Person, Thing, and Intern at WWW! The Fluffy McWhiskers administration also extends their warmest cheer on this purrfect day. | Walfo Claus Unleashes a Dual Emotion Blizzard: Joy and a Tinge of Fear Sweep Across the Globe. Additionally subterranean horrors, the Checkland Mole Family, extend a happy holiday message to all those who visited their sunken carnival this year. Happy Holidays from the WWW family. | |
| Sunday, 12/24/2023 | Global Festivities Unleashed: Walfo Claus Spotted Spreading Cheer Worldwide! | Walfo Claus Spreads Joy Globally: Enigmatic Figure Delivers Presents Worldwide in Unprecedented Holiday Surprise | |
| Saturday, 12/23/2023 | So be good, for your own sake | So act wise, ungrateful rake | |
| Friday, 12/22/2023 | He knows if youve been bad or good | He judges deeds both foul and fair | |
| Thursday, 12/21/2023 | He knows when youre awake | Hes aware of your every wake | |
| Wednesday, 12/20/2023 | He sees you when youre sleeping | His gaze follows you in slumber | |
| Tuesday, 12/19/2023 | World Laughter Day: Global Giggle Fest Spreads Joy Across the Globe | Grandma Mildreds Spice-Induced Synesthesia Takes Her Taste Buds on a Wild Ride | |
| Monday, 12/18/2023 | Townspeople Organize Giant Pillow Fight, Spreading Laughter and Feathers | Event: Happy birthday, Sinjongy. From JoeyFace Posts to Ragging on David, Sinjongy has been a weather extraordinaire since time immemorial. WWW thanks you for your support, Sinjongy, even though it has come, at times, at the right-hand of the anti-director. Let us all raise a bucket to the Worlds First Walfo Supreme Victor and toast Sinjongys storied history on this special day. Im glad its your birthday, happy birthday to you | |
| Sunday, 12/17/2023 | Electric Artistry: Neon-Glowing Art Installations Light Up Urban Landscapes. | Eerie Radiance Signals Turning Point in World Wide Weather Networks Accuracy | |
| Saturday, 12/16/2023 | Sheep Liberate from Frozen Prison, Embrace Change | The Legend of the Sea Serpent: For centuries, sailors have reported sightings of a massive sea serpent that roams the depths of the ocean. Despite numerous expeditions to find the creature, no one has been able to capture any conclusive evidence of its existence. | |
| Friday, 12/15/2023 | Gentle Creatures Grant Freedom to Themselves and Ice King | The Unexplained Phenomena of Roswell: In 1947, a UFO reportedly crashed in Roswell, New Mexico. The incident has since become one of the most famous UFO sightings in history, with many people claiming that the US government covered up the event. | |
| Thursday, 12/14/2023 | Cracks Spread as Sheep and Ice King Share Vulnerability | Investigative Report by wienerwizardwhizkid: Who flipped the tables at World Wide Weather HQ. Was it the recently spotted Walfis Arachnis or Ruckus? | |
| Wednesday, 12/13/2023 | Sheeps Empathetic Plea Shatters Ice Monarchs Heart | Terrifying Video Footage Emerges of Shadowy Figures Roaming Abandoned Asylum | |
| Tuesday, 12/12/2023 | Sheep Confront Enigmatic Figure on Glistening Icy Throne | In a shocking spectacle, RuckusSpooks perches atop towering stack of tables in meteorologists office | |
| Monday, 12/11/2023 | Sheep Follow Shimmering Footprints Through Icy Labyrinth | Giggles and Gulls: Kris Berger Embraces the Comedic Chaos of Avian Attention as Hungry Seagulls Flock to Her While She Wore Hotdog Heaven Perfume. Hotdog Heaven perfume declared by scientists as an accidental Avian Aphrodisiac | |
| Sunday, 12/10/2023 | Sci-Fi Living: Sustainable Floating Cities Designed for Earths Future. | Investigative Report by joejumbojohnson: One-armed baboon escapes Banandaloo home, bites local resident. The baboon is named Mark. | |
| Saturday, 12/09/2023 | Futuristic Fashion: Luminous Clothing and Metallic Accessories Take Center Stage. | THERE FLAMP. City council stunned as the real, live Mayor Flamp returns to Flampsterville. Confusion arises as to why the search party was disbanded all those months ago and a petunia became mayor instead. The true Mayor Flamp is reportedly furious. | |
| Friday, 12/08/2023 | The Haunting of Hotdog Hill and the Sausage Vortex Becomes Worlds Number 1 Podcast | A prankster replaces all city street signs with ones featuring hilarious puns and pop culture references, confusing and amusing drivers and pedestrians alike. Automotive accidents rise by 14 percent. | |
| Thursday, 12/07/2023 | Jetpacks for Everyone: Commuting Gets an Upgrade with Personal Flight Devices. | Investigative Report by wienerwizardwhizkid: I am Ruckus | |
| Wednesday, 12/06/2023 | Brave Lamb Discovers Mysterious Glow in Frozen Palace | Investigative Report by sinjongy: Famous Walfo cheater and table flipper, ruckus, has been sentenced with a one-way ticket to the moon at David Stratfords location. WWW anchors celebrate the end of his terrestrial rampage. | |
| Tuesday, 12/05/2023 | it is time to boogie with Mother Nature | Surreal Rainstorms Defy Expectations, Leave Town Enchanted | |
| Monday, 12/04/2023 | As I gently touched Daniels hand, an electric surge coursed through my entire body, sending shivers down my spine. | In a battle for control, World Wide Weather employees face off against unleashed forces of nature | |
| Sunday, 12/03/2023 | Extraordinary Teen Pianist Wins International Competition, Earning Praise from Renowned Musicians. | Fluffy McWhiskers plans a Fluff-a-Thon fundraiser to prove his fluffiness after claiming to be the worlds fluffiest politician. #McWhiskersFluffsplosion quickly became a trending hashtag worldwide. | |
| Saturday, 12/02/2023 | World Record Broken as Daring Adventurer Completes First Solo Balloon Flight around the Globe. | The Eerie Foggy Nights of Sleepy Hollow: A town in upstate New York is plagued by mysterious fog that descends on the town every night. Locals report strange sightings and eerie noises during these foggy nights. | |
| Friday, 12/01/2023 | Visionary Artists Sculpture Exhibition Captures Essence of Human Emotion and Leaves Audiences Awestruck. | A group of children have developed a way to communicate telepathically with each other, leading to a new era of human connection. |
November, 2023
| Date | AM Headline | PM Headline | Special Note |
|---|---|---|---|
| Thursday, 11/30/2023 | From Mortals to Celestials: Collaborating for Accurate Prophecies | The mysterious disappearance of a group of hikers in the Russian Ural Mountains. | |
| Wednesday, 11/29/2023 | Small Town Rallies Behind Elderly Widow, Rebuilding Her Home Destroyed by Devastating Tornado of Tickling Leaves. | Flampsterville city council is determined to take better care of their particularly peculiar petunia mayor, Mayor Flamp. At this time, all of the flowers have fallen and most of the leaves have yellowed. Mayor Flamp, it seems, is in dire straights after city council forgets to water over the long weekend. | |
| Tuesday, 11/28/2023 | Renowned Chef Opens Expensive Restaurant Providing Gourmet Meals of Cooked Haaw Satayen | Fear Grips Society, World-wide Hotdog Ban considered in Wake of Allen Greenfield Incident with the Spindly-Legged Hotdog Men Hybrids | |
| Monday, 11/27/2023 | Crew Ventures Deeper into Enigmatic Weather Phenomena Hotspot | A group of scientists creates a device that can control peoples dreams, but it starts to have unhinged consequences. | |
| Sunday, 11/26/2023 | tiny flying creatures made entirely of mustard seeds found at local farmers market | Investigative Report by joejumbojohnson: Kris Bergers exclusive feature on the best hot dog joints in town. | |
| Saturday, 11/25/2023 | is there a food wetter than soup? | Investigative Report by sinjongy: The number of Macbeth Maverick criminal-related incidents has dropped to zero as of October 1, 2023. Detective Joey Salami is absolutely baffled. | |
| Friday, 11/24/2023 | World Wide Weather Networks Predictive Powers Unpredictably Captivate Canadian Audiences | The particularly peculiar petunia, Mayor Flamp, has been showing signs of stress this week yellow leaves, loss of petals, etc. City council has taken this as a sign to rescind their recently enacted ordinances. | |
| Thursday, 11/23/2023 | Inexplicable Raindrops Defy Gravity and Mesmerize World Wide Weather Network Crew | A young girl discovers that she has the power to control the weather, but soon realizes that her powers come with a heavy price | |
| Wednesday, 11/22/2023 | Mysterious glowing orbs descend upon Satayen, unfortunately cooking all of the Raw Haaw. Kris Berger is reportedly in shambles. | Group of People Found Living Inside Abandoned Subway Tunnel for Over a Decade | |
| Tuesday, 11/21/2023 | Heroic Firefighter Rescues Family from Raging Inferno, Earning Communitys Gratitude and Admiration. | Investigative Report by sinjongy: The S.H.I.E.L.D.S. Single Hotdog Interstellar Earth-Lunar Delivery System has been compromised after local coffee brewers form the Barista Ballistics Confederation, capable of intercepting hotdogs being delivered to David Stratford on the moon. The intentions of the BBC, beyond just provoking David, are currently unknown. | |
| Monday, 11/20/2023 | Breathtaking Underwater Coral Garden Found in Unexplored Ocean Depths | Investigative Report by joejumbojohnson: Anchorwoman, Kris Berger participated in the inaugural R3 event hosted by BBAWA Bun Brawl Amateur Wrestling Association. The R3 Relish Riot Rumble challenged Kris as Mustardo, the condiment crusader, proved to be a worthy opponent in the ring. The BBAWA extends their juiciest thanks and franks to Kris and Mustardo for bringing hot moves like The Sizzling Suplex, The Kraut Crusher Clothesline, and The Hotdog Hammer Fist. | |
| Sunday, 11/19/2023 | Astonishing Desert Mirage Creates Illusion of Oasis in Barren Land | Update on the Polyoptic Potato, Spudsy: Fame has got to be too much for poor Spudsys tuberous heart, seeks solace in the tranquility of nature. | |
| Saturday, 11/18/2023 | As I stepped into the room, I saw a guy named Daniel standing there, his eyes flickering with an eerie glow. Consumed by curiosity and feeling an inexplicable pull, I reached out to touch Daniel... | Mustardo, the Condiment Crusader, battles Spindly-Legged Hotdog Creatures, mustard thieves, and ketchup bandits in culinary chaos. Mustardo wins the day. | |
| Friday, 11/17/2023 | Enchanted Forest: Rare Bioluminescent Fungi Illuminate the Darkness | Investigative Report by worldwideweather: The Plugging Process in The Internatorium Results in Interns Glowing with Excitement | |
| Thursday, 11/16/2023 | Massive Tsunami Threatens Coastline After Underwater Volcanic Eruption | Investigative Report by wienerwizardwhizkid: How WienerWizardWhizKid Turned Triples into Treasure: The Story of a 333-dollar Wealth Achiever. Meanwhile, a secret society called The Society of Triple-Turners has emerged, creating a global craze for hidden riches. | |
| Wednesday, 11/15/2023 | Captivating Symphony Orchestra Performs Beneath the Northern Lights | Frostburgs magical event - White Wonderland: A Snowy Spectacle. Grab your hats and mittens and head to Frostburg Park for enchanting activities. Build magnificent snowmen in the Frosty Olympics competition or enjoy the exhilarating thrill of sledding down Frostbite Hill. Take a stroll through the Luminous Lanes, to see frosty landscapes decorated by local artisans. Head to Winter Delights Market for delicious seasonal treats like gingerbread houses straight out of fairy tales. | |
| Tuesday, 11/14/2023 | Theres nothing like watching Grandma Sandy pop-locking her arthritis away while simultaneously making snow angels... all in pursuit of some good ol seasonal magic. | Update on the Polyoptic Potato, Spudsy: Its countless blinking eyes synchronize in a rhythmic dance that hypnotizes anyone who dares to gaze upon them. Word quickly spreads about the kaleidoscope of gazes as scientists are baffled by this multi-ocular tuber. | |
| Monday, 11/13/2023 | Little Timmy flapped his arms pretending to be Elsa from Frozen and then the real white flakes began to fall. | Silence Falls: Allen Greenfield Vanishes after Sausage Vortex Consumes Him | |
| Sunday, 11/12/2023 | Uncle Bob opted for a classic 80s breakdance routine, spinning on his head like a demented wind turbine. | Investigative Report by isomorph_: Unprecedented Chaos Unleashed: Massive Unauthorized Parade Ravages Sarasasaland, Leaving Downtown in Catastrophic Shambles, Residents Express Shock and Mixed Reactions. One Local Resident, Standing Upon a Pile of Rubble Where His Home Used to Be, Said totally worth | |
| Saturday, 11/11/2023 | The sight of Aunt Mildred twerking for a blizzard was both horrifying and strangely mesmerizing. | Investigative Report by isomorph_: Golden Retrievers Heroic Rescue Unlocks a Hidden Power Within. A golden retriever with anti-electricity fur coat emerges as town hero after saving victims from downed powerlines following Lightning Beast storm | |
| Friday, 11/10/2023 | November Surprise: Snow Dance Wars Heat Up Midwest! | The Anti-Hotdog Crusaders Unintentional Nightmare - Spindly-Legged Hotdog Creatures Swarmed Around Him, Writhing and Weaving Themselves into Enormous Vortex of Sausages | |
| Thursday, 11/09/2023 | unforeseen connection between emotion and climate perplexed both scientists and visitors as tourists flock to experience the power of their emotions on emoweather in the Northern Cascades Hinterland | Investigative Report by joejumbojohnson: Spudsy the Potatos Hilarious Movember Mishap: More Eyes, Less Mustache. A cold potato, named Spudsy, attempts to grow a mustache to participate in Movember, however only manages to sprout more eyes. That is right, with every passing day, tiny eyeballs pop up all over its bumpy surface. | |
| Wednesday, 11/08/2023 | Mysterious Misty Bean Phenomenon Grips Small Canadian Town Known for Their Fondness of Beans and Mist | Horror Unleashed: Spindly-Legged Hotdogs Merge With Squished Buns, Forming Ominous Amalgamation of Humanoid Beings Made Entirely of Meat and Bread. All Allens fault? | |
| Tuesday, 11/07/2023 | The interplay between human emotions and emoweather revealed. Can science explain it? | Grocery Store Mayhem: Hotdogs Transformed into Spindly-Legged Creatures As Allen Greenfield Hurls Hotdogs Onto Grocery Store Floor | |
| Monday, 11/06/2023 | Professor Quilliam Puckerbottom III, the articulate orange tree frog, found himself perched on a lily pad at the edge of an enchanted pond. As he croaked out his scholarly theories about the diverse species of flora and fauna, a peculiar gust of wind blew through the trees, carrying with it a strange aroma that tickled his tiny nostrils... | City council in Flampsterville is hard at work deciphering potential messages from their particularly peculiar petunia, Mayor Flamp. They have recently enacted noise and curfew ordinances after the petunia sprouted a new bud. | |
| Sunday, 11/05/2023 | Stunning Meteor Shower Illuminates Night Skies, Dazzling Stargazers | A new type of insect is discovered that can mimic human speech | |
| Saturday, 11/04/2023 | Local man mistakenly proposes to a stranger, realizing it only after the proposal goes viral on social media. | Investigative Report by joejumbojohnson: Cosmok mayor, Dr. Wackelpants, institutes unexpected ban on hot dogs, sparking outrage from local meat slingers. In the midst of protests, Sir Nutsalot the Squirrel, announces own bid for mayor standing tall upon a branch swaying gently in the breeze. With his tiny paws pointing to a better future, Sir Nutsalot captivates the hearts and minds of Cosmokians. | |
| Friday, 11/03/2023 | Captured on Live TV: Grandpas Mind-boggling Escape from Cement Encasement Captures Global Attention. Hide and Seek Trophy Awarded | Mayor Fluffy McWhiskers has returned to the public eye and is no longer behaving strangely. The crazies in Flampsterville, however, are still adamant that this particularly peculiar petunia is indeed their long-lost Mayor Flamp. City council has banded together to care for the flower and elect it the rightful mayor. | |
| Thursday, 11/02/2023 | Looking back on the month of October and wow... things got pretty strange there. The world was on the brink of pink gooze calamity but the lunar device from the chest in costa rica restored order and brought new hope. | Communication from David Stratford has been restored. David is reportedly doing fine on the lunar surface, though still lonely. Detective Joey Salami lost his blossoms and is behaving normally. What a relief. | |
| Wednesday, 11/01/2023 | Hello? Is anyone receiving this broadcast? Ok I think we are back on the air. The Gooze is gone folks. We have been saved. | World is in shock as the mysterious device seems to have eradicated the pink gooze on Earth. Apparently the unraveling was a success. We have not received any communication from the lunar surface where our anchorman, David Stratford, was last seen activating the device. |
October, 2023
| Date | AM Headline | PM Headline | Special Note |
|---|---|---|---|
| Tuesday, 10/31/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: The WITCHESARANTHEONLYONESFLYINGTHISOCTOBER Event in Westville kicks off this morning. Come on down to see witches from all corners of the globe displaying their flying skills on broomsticks amidst swirling winds caused by an unexpected heatwave. Remember to dress warmly but comfortably due to unpredictable weather patterns encountered during an Abra-cold front—ultra-sticky spider spray suggested too. | Event: ALL EYES ON THE SKIES - The world awaits David Stratfords moonwalk as Earth is all-but-consumed by pink ooze. It appears that David will be landing at 7:45 pm EST. | |
| Monday, 10/30/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Local Grandpa Wins Hide-and-Seek Championship Against Grandkids by encasing himself in cement | WWW Pink Gooze Initiative reports that pink ooze sample has vanished from experimental chamber, strange vegetative substance found in its place. Meanwhile, an anonymous call claims to have information regarding Detective Joey Salamis whereabouts. | |
| Sunday, 10/29/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: A crimson hurricane swirling with whispers of forgotten souls as flying jellyfish caught in an otherworldly wind tunnel | Trudy Melt discovers the dark origin of Walfo, deep in the bowels of WWW backrooms in Room W4170. | |
| Saturday, 10/28/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Sleepers Beware of Tornado Nightmares - Nightly Twisters Tickle Your Dreams with Wraithly Wind | A Puzzling Return: Mayor McWhiskers Rescued from The Chosen Moon Cultists, Reportedly Behaving Strangely Upon Return. In first public announcement, McWhiskers assures folks that there is nothing to worry about - it was all a big misunderstanding. Meanwhile, McWhiskers disbands Pink Gooze research efforts in Fluffysburg | |
| Friday, 10/27/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Funeral Whale Heard in Butternut Cove: Peaceful Town Shattered by Aquatic Terror in The Skies Producing Haunting Songs | Just a few more days until Amateur Astronaut and WWW Anchorman, David Stratford, lands upon the lunar surface. So far his journey among the stars appears to have been fairly uneventful. Especially compared with the pink ooze catastrophe here on Earth and the crazies claiming that a particularly peculiar looking petunia is the long-lost Mayor Flamp. | |
| Thursday, 10/26/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Sunken Carnival Brings Back Creepy Clown Epidemic | Jill Dandys Cryptic Date Night: Stunning Secret Revealed by Accountant Boyfriend, Ben Jenkins, in the Moonlight... | |
| Wednesday, 10/25/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Creepy Doll Collection Grows on Its Own, Haunting Local Antique Shop | Thank you to all the folks who participated in the World Wide Weather Haunted Harvest Jack-o-lantern Art Contest. Thank you LindFate, WWWK, Gedo, Ruckus, Iso, Zippity, Sinjongy, and JJJ. Everyones art was truly amazing, which made for an incredibly difficult decision... but your winner is... JoeJumboJohnson with the stormy, once-struck blue goo jack-o-lantern. Congrats JJJ. And this just in: Prizes will be awarded for everyone who participated. | |
| Tuesday, 10/24/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Enigmatic Stone Circles Erected in Park, Puzzling Experts | Trudy Melt ventures deeper into the WWW backrooms and discovers a shocking revelation about her decommissioned intern colleagues in Room 1482 | |
| Monday, 10/23/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: The Phantom Snowstorm of Antarctica - Researchers stationed in Antarctica report experiencing a snowstorm that appears out of nowhere and disappears just as suddenly, leaving no trace of its presence. | Pink Ooze Unleashed: Full-Scale Experiments Commence Worldwide as Gooze spreads to waterways. Global Initiatives Undertake Full-On Ooze Experiments to Determine Origin, Purpose, and Mitigation. New WWW Pink Gooze Initiative launches. The WWW PGI promises to help the world get to the bottom of this phenomenon with state of the art research. | |
| Sunday, 10/22/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: PUPPIES IN PUMPKINS. KITTENS IN CORN. | Hotdog Hall of Fame Haunted by Flaming Specters: Ghostly Wieners Roaming the Halls, Causing Heart Attacks and Delicious Odors | |
| Saturday, 10/21/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Microphone and teleprompter issues plague WWWs broadcast yesterday. Interns capitalize on the chaos. | The Checkland Mole Family Apologizes After Subterranean Carnival Goes Awry. Mole Family Promises to Do Better. Sunken Carnies Make No Such Promise. | |
| Friday, 10/20/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Sinister Shadows Take Over Town Square, Residents Left in Darkness | Possible source of cursed image found at WWW HQ. Intern reveals they discovered the image in the abandoned server room, Room 749, on a device that has not been powered on in years. | |
| Thursday, 10/19/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Abandoned Mansion Reappears, Inviting Brave Souls to Explore Its Secrets | Mayor McWhiskers Disappearance: Is The Moon Cult The Chosen To Blame? | |
| Wednesday, 10/18/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Moonlit Cemetery Resonates with Eerie Melodies of the Departed | Global Bafflement and The Curse Unleashed: Odd Behavior Surfaces at Pink Ooze Sites Worldwide. Meanwhile, Mysterious Images Bizarre Influence on Viewer Behavior - Cursed Image Said to Cause Erratic Behavior in Those Who See It on WWW Twitch Stream | |
| Tuesday, 10/17/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Ancient Spellbook Discovered, Unleashes Strange Powers on Town | Trudy Melts relentless quest to unveil the mysteries hidden beneath WWW HQ has pushed her further into the backrooms than ever before... right into Room 749. This seems to be some sort of abandoned server room. | |
| Monday, 10/16/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Time-Traveling Watch Washes Ashore, Reveals Secrets of the Past | Directors Goo Mystery: Pink Ooze Discovery within the Directors Blue Goo Bucket prompts thorough investigation | |
| Sunday, 10/15/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Swarms of Glowing Fireflies Spell Out Cryptic Messages in the Night Sky | Sweet News for Smiles: Dentist Invents New Candy That Does Not Rot Teeth. From Dentist Chair to Candy Store, These Breakthrough Sweets Will Not Harm Your Teeth | |
| Saturday, 10/14/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Shelter Dog Finds Loving Home and Becomes a Beloved Family Member. | Interns Bizarre Revelation: Intern Confession Links Treasure Chest to Davids Spacecraft. A confession from an intern about placing the chest on Davids rocket shocks WWW Director. | |
| Friday, 10/13/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Midnight Parade of Phantoms Roams Through Sleepy Village After Cursed Image Found on Billboard | Fears mount as ghostly apparitions escape The Void and begin spreading throughout WWW HQ | |
| Thursday, 10/12/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Enchanted Forest Appears in the Heart of the Desert, Defying Logic | Cult Connection? Worldwide phenomena of Disappearing Cats Raise Questions About The Moon Cults Activity. Representatives for The Chosen refuse to speak with reporters. | |
| Wednesday, 10/11/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Ghostly Shipwreck Rises from the Depths, Crew Still Aboard | Mystery Sprouts: Detective Joey Salamis Unnoticed Vegetative Growth Raises Questions Amid Disappearance. What exactly is this growing out of his clothes? Does it hold clues about his disappearance? | |
| Tuesday, 10/10/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Abandoned Carnival Rides Come to Life, Residents Flee in Fear | Anchorwoman, Trudy Melt, Decides to Explore the Hidden Backrooms in WWW HQ. Deep within the bowels of the earth, under the derelict Blockbuster-turned-HQ, many rooms of unknown purpose have been found and Trudy is determined to discover their purpose. Her first major discovery is in Room 313 which, shockingly, holds a pile of potatoes. | |
| Monday, 10/09/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Lost City Found Beneath the Amazon Rainforest, Filled with Ancient Treasures | Mysterious Pink Ooze Phenomenon Spreads Worldwide: Scientists Baffled as Large Pink Globs found everywhere, even in the strangest places, across the globe. | |
| Sunday, 10/08/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Haunted House Turns Out to Be Portal to Another Dimension | The Checkland Mole Familys Eerie Underground Carnival: Where Nightmares Come to Life as Secrets Dance in the Shadows. The Mole Familys Unsettling Midnight Communion with Subterranean Beings and Sunken Carnival Barkers | |
| Saturday, 10/07/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Librarys Rare Books Begin to Whisper Secrets of the Occult | Missing Costa Rica Chest Raises Questions, Detective Joey Salami Implicated. As a chest recovered from Costa Rica mysteriously vanishes, suspicions escalate, with Detective Joey Salamis name surfacing in the intrigue, casting shadows on the baffling series of events which raises more questions than answers. | |
| Friday, 10/06/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Mysterious Crop Circles Appear Overnight, Baffle Local Farmers | Cursed Image Materializes, Director Cannot Determine Cause. A Cursed Image Has Haunted the WWW Stream for Over Two Days Now, Disturbing WWW Watchers. Origin unknown. | |
| Thursday, 10/05/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Dachshund and Duck Form Unlikely Duo, Become Internet Sensation | Paranoid Astrophysicists Stark Warning: A Cosmic Threat from a Previously Unseen Invasion Begins at Edges of Our Solar System. Meanwhile, A Cult Worshiping the Moon Emerges in Shadows of Cosmic Invasion Conspiracy, dubbed The Chosen. | |
| Wednesday, 10/04/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: A towering tsunami composed of shattered mirrors reflecting fractured reality caused by dancing condors made of frost | Detective Joey Salamis Has Gone Missing, Sparking Concern. Renowned Detective Joey Salami goes missing under mysterious circumstances, leaving behind a void in the world of mysteries he once solved. Unknown when he was last seen or heard from. | |
| Tuesday, 10/03/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Orchestra of Robot Musicians Performs Symphony, Sparks Fly During Robot Dance Party. Whole City Now Engulfed in Flames. | Enigmatic Backroom Unearthed at WWW HQ Baffles Experts. Inside the heart of the WWW HQ, a strange backroom has been discovered, confounding experts and prompting speculation about its purpose and origins. | |
| Monday, 10/02/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: There is a guy named Daniel here to see you. | Mysterious Pink Ooze Discovered in Costa Rica by WWW Interns. As WWW interns monitored the original Detective Joey Salami rescue site, an unexpected find emerged large, peculiar globs of pink ooze that have baffled scientists and locals alike. There is an undeniable and unexplained phenomena at work here. | |
| Sunday, 10/01/2023 | Spooky October Surprise: Burning hailstones that emit joyful laughter when melting | Event: The WWW Interstellar Initiative and the Cosmic Thespian Guild Successfully Launched David Stratford on his Lunar Journey today. In this historic moment, David is now propelled on his 30 day journey to the moon. |
September, 2023
| Date | AM Headline | PM Headline | Special Note |
|---|---|---|---|
| Saturday, 09/30/2023 | The Secret Underground Tunnels of Rome: Rumors persist that there is an extensive network of underground tunnels and catacombs beneath the streets of Rome. Some suspect that they may have been used for nefarious purposes. | WWW anchorman and amateur astronaut, David Stratford, launches into space on a lunar mission tomorrow. Join us for live on-air coverage of the launch starting at 7pm EST. | |
| Friday, 09/29/2023 | An eerie rain made of shards from shattered dreams cascading down like inflatable clouds that bounce through the sky | Inventor creates a machine that can turn anything into a sandwich, but accidentally turns himself into a pastrami on rye. | |
| Thursday, 09/28/2023 | A group of mischievous raccoons are caught on camera stealing a whole pizza from a local pizzeria, and the video goes viral on social media. | Local fishermen in the waters near Butternut Cove have reported seeing massive, tentacled creatures lurking beneath the surface, leading some to believe that a Lovecraftian horror is living in the depths. | |
| Wednesday, 09/27/2023 | Ice crystals flooding the skies as surreal blizzards enchant reality while bolts of lightning transform into ethereal dancing figures in mid-air | A mysterious fog descends on the city, causing people to hallucinate and see terrifying things. | |
| Tuesday, 09/26/2023 | Majestic Ice Caves Discovered in Remote Arctic Wilderness where Chocolate rain flavored with strawberry lightning bolts happen | Investigative Report by isomorph_: Something extraordinary happened two months ago, in July, the arrival of the Invisible Storm. No one could see it, yet everyone could feel its presence. The phenomenon has puzzled scientists, intrigued mystics, and captivated the imaginations of townsfolk. A lot has happened in the two months since this storm has been identified... | |
| Monday, 09/25/2023 | Talking umbrellas that predict future weather patterns accurately will shout PICK ME UP when rain is imminent | Event: David Stratford, in his attempt to become the worlds first amateur astronaut, completed his first Zero-G test flight today. During the training, David attempted to enjoy a cup of coffee, apparently not understanding how liquid would behave without gravity. Coffee globules escaped the cup and formed a floating brown cloud around him. David struggled to catch all the droplets before his trainers saw. | |
| Sunday, 09/24/2023 | Scientists accidentally create a new type of tree that grows upside down but it turns out to be completely useless | A scientist develops a machine that can manipulate peoples emotions, leading to some disturbing and unethical experiments. | |
| Saturday, 09/23/2023 | Local Artist Creates Street Murals, Transforming City Into Open-Air Gallery after An Enormous Solar Flare Disrupts Satellite Communication Across the Globe | Investigative Report by joejumbojohnson: Mustard Madness: A Flavorful Journey into the World of Too Many Hot Dogs, from Mustard Squirts to Sizzling Secrets | |
| Friday, 09/22/2023 | Worlds Longest Hug-a-Thon interrupted by tornadoes spawning sentient dust devils that mimic fleeting thoughts and memories | Investigative Report by sinjongy: Animal Armada Extravaganza. A horde of mischievous animals broke free due to an enchantment gone awry in our zoo. You must stop them. Regal them with tales tales brimming with anything remotely cooperating-crosswalk related? Remember, if you stumble upon an elephant practicing ballet or find yourself being serenaded by jazz-loving squirrels at 3 am featuring special guest appearances from frogs on saxophones, remember pepper spray wont chase away these fantastical creatures. | |
| Thursday, 09/21/2023 | Small Town Sets New Record for Most Volunteers in a Cleanup Drive | Investigative Report by tylerm2: Catnip Heist: How a Gang of Feline Thieves Broke into a Pet Store and Stole a Fortune in Catnip. Best Cat, Comet, and Most Beautiful Cat, Audra, Under Suspicion of Masterminding the Crime. | |
| Wednesday, 09/20/2023 | Local man arrested for training squirrels to attack his ex-girlfriends new boyfriend. | A mysterious figure known only as The Watcher has been spotted around Butternut Cove, silently observing the townspeople and leaving behind cryptic messages. | |
| Tuesday, 09/19/2023 | Singing polar bears wrapped in twisters of rainbow mist cause a wall of sound crashing upon the world with a cacophony of thunderstorms | The town of Shady Hollow has been experiencing a string of bizarre occurrences, including unexplained power outages and strange symbols appearing on buildings overnight. | |
| Monday, 09/18/2023 | Non-Profits Efforts Pay Off: Endangered Animal Population Doubles after Rainbows materializing momentarily before fading into wisps of elusive colors | Event: Happy Birthday gedo0261. Our station is forever grateful to the dedication Gedo has shown to building and maintaining our community. From translating and maintaining the spanish-language wiki to founding the discord server, Gedo does it all and continues to gift us with their talents. Thank you, Gedo. And happy birthday. | |
| Sunday, 09/17/2023 | Kindhearted Stranger Returns Lost Wallet with All Contents Intact, including Iridescent icicles with hidden messages from forgotten civilizations | Reports have been coming in of a strange, glowing object in the sky that seems to be getting closer and closer to Earth. Scientists are scrambling to figure out what it could be. | |
| Saturday, 09/16/2023 | Inspirational Teacher Honored for 30 Years of Empowering Students with Cyclones shaped like serpents, tirelessly entangling opposing winds within their grip | The legend of the Chupacabra, a creature said to attack and drink the blood of livestock. | |
| Friday, 09/15/2023 | High School Robotics Team Wins Global Championship, Celebrates Victory with Gustav, the wind-surfing penguin | Investigative Report by isomorph_: Fluffy Temporal Thieves Swipe Snowflakes in Daring Caper: Mischievous time-traveling squirrels found stealing snowflakes from the Future Visualization Machine. | |
| Thursday, 09/14/2023 | Blooming tulips in an icy desert doused with ethereal moonlight glow | Investigative Report by f4mediaproductions: WWW Anchorwoman, Kris Berger, faces off against Allen The Anti-Hotdog Crusader in High-Stakes Rocket League Showmatch Amidst Sabotage Fears. Kris Bergers esports team, Hotdog Hurricanes, along with Twin Team members Timmy and Tommy Topper, find themselves in a familiar situation against Allen. Coach F4 wonders how Allen will sabotage this time... | |
| Wednesday, 09/13/2023 | Local Community Comes Together to Build Playground, Spreading Smiles to Kids | Investigative Report by isomorph_: Cheese blenders in the chilly splendor | |
| Tuesday, 09/12/2023 | Town bans all pets except for miniature horses, citing their superior companionship and house-training abilities. | Investigative Report by isomorph_: MonkeySmasher_1s Discord Account Hacked, Unleashing a Digital Intrigue: As the cyber assailants identity remains cloaked in mystery, a thrilling race against time unfolds to safeguard not just one account, but an entire digital realm from the shadows of a menacing breach. | |
| Monday, 09/11/2023 | Man Discovers That His Left Hand Has the Ability to Predict the Future | WWW anchorman and hopeful future astronaut, David Stratford, continues his astronautical training. During a grueling physical fitness test, David somehow mistook the treadmill for a giant hamster wheel and attempted to run inside it. It took three instructors to extricate him, all while David insisted that the hamster wheel concept could revolutionize space travel. One trainer was heard saying, Ay ay ay. | |
| Sunday, 09/10/2023 | Town introduces a new law that requires all citizens to dance in public for at least 30 minutes each day. | Investigative Report by lindfate: Unexplained Vocal Phenomenon Sparks Surprise Surge in Badger Population, Snakes May Hold the Key to Depopulation. | |
| Saturday, 09/09/2023 | Man breaks into zoo to pet the lions, ends up getting licked by a giraffe instead. | A group of scientists accidentally create a portal to another dimension where time runs backwards, everyone is a flapper now. | |
| Friday, 09/08/2023 | City officials announce plan to replace all stop signs with emojis to make driving more fun. Geriatric automobile crashes have increased ten-fold. | Rare Cosmic Alignment Causes Gravity to Temporarily Reverse, Sending Objects Floating into the Sky. | |
| Thursday, 09/07/2023 | The discovery of a new species of bioluminescent seahorses in the Mariana Trench | A group of scientists creates a device that can turn thoughts into smells, leading to a surge in demand for mental aromatherapy. | |
| Wednesday, 09/06/2023 | The strange case of a town in Arizona where it rains spiders every year. | Rumors are circulating about a group of cultists operating out of an abandoned church in the outskirts of Grimmock, performing dark rituals and sacrificing animals. | |
| Tuesday, 09/05/2023 | The strange occurrence of ice circles, large discs of ice that form in rivers and lakes. | A massive earthquake hits the city, causing buildings to crumble and collapse, revealing a hidden network of tunnels and secret laboratories underneath. | |
| Monday, 09/04/2023 | Local man successfully avoids all small talk by pretending to be asleep in Uber ride | WWW anchorman and hopeful future astronaut, David Stratford, brought his space-themed lunchbox to training today. During the session, he entertained himself by making airplane noises while eating and even pretended to launch a rocket using his soda can. The instructor began losing his patience while expressing concerns that Davids behavior was distracting and felt he was not fully engaged in the training. | |
| Sunday, 09/03/2023 | The Enigmatic Aurora Castle: A magnificent castle in the Arctic region, surrounded by a mesmerizing aurora borealis, has recently appeared out of nowhere. No one knows who built it, and how it is sustained in the harsh weather conditions of the North. | Investigative Report by sinjongy: Controversial Hairstyle Experiments by Kris Berber Raise Concerns Amidst Indifference. Reports have begun to spread about anchorwoman Kris Bergers hairsylist, Kris Berbers unethical hairstyle experiments being performed on various interns, but does anybody care? In unrelated news, supply of Qwikrete nationwide plummets as demand soars. | |
| Saturday, 09/02/2023 | The Haunted Lighthouse of Point Reyes: A lighthouse on the coast of California is rumored to be haunted by the ghost of a former lighthouse keeper. Visitors report hearing strange noises and feeling a chill in the air when they visit the lighthouse. | Investigative Report by tylerm2: Hunger-Driven Interns Stage Epic Raid on WWW Cold Potato Vault. Their ravenous hunger led them to break through the vault doors in record time. Luckily, the Cold Potato was safely stored in Tylerms backpack instead of the vault. Potato lives to see another day. | |
| Friday, 09/01/2023 | Time Anomaly Causes Objects from Different Eras to Swap Places. | Investigative Report by sikataraeda: Frankfurter Funland, A Juicy Sausage Amusement Park has recently opened. Everything is hotdog and condiment themed, from the thrill rides to the live shows. |
August, 2023
| Date | AM Headline | PM Headline | Special Note |
|---|---|---|---|
| Thursday, 08/31/2023 | Steampunk Skyport: Airships Dock at Retro-Futuristic Port in the Clouds. | Investigative Report by lindfate: A candy producer makes a harmless update to the design of their wrappers. However, individuals inclined towards conspiracy theories and strange thoughts suggest that these new wrappers might be covert government surveillance tools. This leads some to discreetly unwrap their candies, concerned that their discussions might be monitored. | |
| Wednesday, 08/30/2023 | Retro Robots Revolt: Mechanical Companions Develop Unexpected Sentience. | Event: Hotdog and Whiskey Wednesday 5: The final Hotdog and Whiskey Wednesday until next year. Thank you all for participating in this month-long annual August event. Our anchors are toasting in your honor while dressed in their juiciest costumes yet. | |
| Tuesday, 08/29/2023 | Euphoria Elixir Unveiled: Beverage Promises Instant Happiness to All Who Drink It. | Investigative Report by worldwideweather: Tumble weasels swirling around streetlamps takes the world by storm. | |
| Monday, 08/28/2023 | Ancient Astronomical Artifacts Predict Future Cosmic Events. | Investigative Report by lindfate: Stange pink glob found in the last VCR on Earth provides more questions than answers. The glob has unknown origins and unknown motivations. The Director has investigated and found it to be organic and responsive to threats and comfort. However, further investigation has not yielded any new information. | |
| Sunday, 08/27/2023 | Revolutionary Retro Gadgets: Classic Devices Modernized with Futuristic Features. | Event: Dannewood hosts a previously unheard of carnival called: Stormy Weather Takes an Unexpected Turn - August ends with a Bright Ending. The carnival owners promise that mysterious lightning gives way to sunny skies, however the carnival has brought special guests and nefarious carnival folk to the town of Dannewood. | |
| Saturday, 08/26/2023 | Exotic Pet Craze: Space Jellyfish and Robo-Pets Becoming Popular Companions. | Event: Happy Birthday Kris Berger. WWWs own hotdog obsessed weatherwoman, Kris Bunson Berger, takes another trip around the sun. What a spectacular, hotdog-filled year Kris has had. | |
| Friday, 08/25/2023 | Time Capsule Dug Up: Predictions from the Past Become Reality in Present Day. | Investigative Report by lindfate: Amusing Cat Tail-Chasing Video Mistaken for Cosmic Phenomenon on Social Media, Sparks Wild Theories of Time-Space Cat Vortex on the Internet | |
| Thursday, 08/24/2023 | Utopian Island Found: Technological Paradise Discovered in Uncharted Waters. | Event: The blockbuster movie Sloth Olympics releases worldwide. A griping slow-action tale about an unlikely group of competitors who showcase outrageous athletic events designed for sloths like tug-of-minor-conflict, slow waving, and three-toed races. Starring Steve Carell as Mike, Bill Murray as Barry, and Taylor Swift as Mary, this heartwarming story highlights the ambition of these brave animals competing head to oddly-numbered-toes. Directed by J.J Abrams of no relation | |
| Wednesday, 08/23/2023 | Cryptic Symbols Reveal Clues to Lost Civilization. | Event: Hotdog and Whiskey Wednesday 4: All of our anchors dressed up in ridiculous hotdog dinosaur costumes today to celebrate the penultimate event. | |
| Tuesday, 08/22/2023 | Retro Rocket Races: High-Speed Competitions Take Off in a Blaze of Color. | Investigative Report by lindfate: Mysterious Maestro of Illusions Orchestrates Faux 10 Million Fireflies Bank Heist, Casting Web of Deception. In a baffling tale of intrigue, a shadowy master of illusions emerged as the puppeteer behind the fabricated spectacle of 10 million fireflies orchestrating a bank heist that never was. The enigmatic architect of deception spun webs of false narrative, captivating both media and witnesses, leaving them entranced by the impossible tale of luminous insects turned criminal accomplices. | |
| Monday, 08/21/2023 | Vintage VR: Nostalgic Virtual Reality Gaming Makes a Resurgence. | Our intrepid anchorman, David Stratford, is taking a step back from station duties while they prepare for the lunar mission. David, entirely untrained in all astronautical affairs, is understandably nervous. Expect to see more and more of our crack team of unpaid interns filling in where needed while David transitions to his new role. | Interns Introduced |
| Sunday, 08/20/2023 | The Mysterious Whirlpool of Naruto: Located in the Naruto Strait in Japan, the Naruto whirlpool is a massive vortex that can reach up to 20 meters in diameter. The cause of this natural phenomenon is unknown, but some believe that it is the result of the tides and currents of the area. | Investigative Report by tylerm2: The Mushroom Kingdoms recent PS5 giveaway took an unexpected turn when it was revealed that the entire affair was orchestrated by an impersonator, not Kris Berger. Gamers, clad in oversized neon overalls and sporting fake mustaches, clumsily bumped into bewildered citizens carrying towering stacks of pizza boxes, triggering an uproarious chain reaction of slipping on banana peels, comically exaggerated double-takes, and even a few accidental pie-in-the-face mishaps. | |
| Saturday, 08/19/2023 | The Mysterious Waterfall of the Lost City: In the heart of the Amazon rainforest, a magnificent waterfall has been discovered that was previously unknown to the outside world. Locals tell tales of an ancient lost city that lies beyond the falls, but no one has been able to explore it due to the treacherous conditions. | Investigative Report by gedo0261: Goopsea, Jack, and Woadie set out to unravel the mysteries of the WWW headquarters, only to find themselves ensnared in an unexpected twist when they stumble upon the eerie Walfos Playhouse. As the once-whimsical adventure takes a sinister turn, their desperate struggle to escape the clutches of Walfo becomes a heart-pounding race against time. The trios journey serves as a riveting reminder that even in the most enchanting escapades, shadows of the unknown can cast a chilling pall. | |
| Friday, 08/18/2023 | The Mysterious Fog of the Ghost Ship: Off the coast of Nova Scotia lies a small island where a ghost ship, the Mary Celeste, was discovered adrift in 1872 with its crew missing. Some say that the island is shrouded in a mysterious fog that has caused many ships to vanish without a trace. | Investigative Report by isomorph_: A Day with David: WWW Anchor David Stratford, per usual, is having a disastrous day. This morning, the baristas were predictably rude and spilled his coffee. Then, on his way to work, David got stuck in traffic and was late for an important meeting. Later, his coworkers ignored him and whisper-whispered about him on air. David is beyond frustrated and is even considering staying in his mothers basement forever. But then he turns his sights to the night sky... | |
| Thursday, 08/17/2023 | The Unsettling Silence of Silent Hill: A small town in the northeastern United States, Silent Hill is known for its eerie atmosphere and inexplicable events. Residents report hearing strange noises and experiencing frightening hallucinations. Some believe that the town is cursed, while others think that it is a gateway to another dimension. | Event: Happy Birthday lindfate. Lindfate is a weather watcher extraordinaire and occasional discord sticker maker and wiki sponge. Thank you for being part of our community, lindfate. Big weather to you and happy birthday | |
| Wednesday, 08/16/2023 | The Enchanted Gardens of Versailles: Visitors to the famous gardens of the Palace of Versailles in France report feeling as though they have been transported to another world. Some believe that the gardens are enchanted, while others think that they may be the site of a hidden portal to another dimension. | Event: Hotdog and Whiskey Wednesday 3: Time for Wacky Wednesday, folks. Today all the WWW anchors get together to dress up as their favorite hotdog condiments and eat some tasty food. This week, we have caterers making very creative and unique appetizers for the audience. | |
| Tuesday, 08/15/2023 | The Phantom Thunderstorms of the Sahara: Residents of a small village in the Sahara desert report hearing thunder and seeing lightning flashes in the distance, but no rain ever falls. Scientists are puzzled by this phenomenon, as thunderstorms require moisture to form. | Event: Kris Berger and DJ Salami LOVE MATCH: Hawthorne residents rejoice. The Kris Berger and Detective Joey Salami LOVE MATCH is underway at the Hawthorne Community Park. Come on down for a wide array of fun activities to enjoy, ranging from carnival-like attractions such as inflatable hotdog bounce castles and wiener dog races, to artisanal food trucks filled with hot Aussie snags. | |
| Monday, 08/14/2023 | The Unseen Depths of Loch Ness: For decades, people have claimed to have seen a monster in Loch Ness, a large freshwater lake in Scotland. Despite numerous attempts to capture conclusive evidence of the creatures existence, no one has been successful. | WWW Interstellar Initiative and Cosmic Thespian Guild Join Forces to Fulfill David Stratfords Space Dreams with a Lunar Mission: The newly established WWW Interstellar Initiative along with the Cosmic Thespian Guild Where ALL Worlds Are a Stage have teamed up to help make David Stratfords dreams a reality by promising to build a rocketship for our intrepid anchor. | |
| Sunday, 08/13/2023 | The Mysterious Origin of the Bermuda Triangle: The Bermuda Triangle, an area in the western part of the North Atlantic Ocean, is notorious for its numerous unexplained disappearances of planes and ships. The cause of these incidents remains a mystery, with some attributing them to supernatural forces. | Investigative Report by lindfate: Unprecedented Absence of Ducks Perplexes Local Community. Strange person found repeating: there is no duck there is no duck there is no duck there is no duck. This chant soon spreads as whole community is found repeating: there is no duck there is no duck there is no duck there is no duck. | |
| Saturday, 08/12/2023 | The efforts of the World Wide Weather Authority to track and monitor dangerous weather events such as hurricanes, tornadoes, and typhoons, and their work to improve early warning systems. | Investigative Report by lindfate: From Jungle Royalty To Furry Overlords: Monkey Rulers Continue Their Reign Of Prosperity. Gibbon Grove And Baboon Bay Among Most Interesting And Creative Exemplars In Simian Governance, Inspiring Coexistence And Progress Globally | |
| Friday, 08/11/2023 | The Strange Lights of Marfa: In a remote town in Texas, strange lights have been observed in the night sky. Some believe that the lights are the result of supernatural forces, while others think that they are simply the result of natural phenomena such as swamp gas or weather balloons. | Investigative Report by lindfate: Ice Cube Discovery Triggers Mass Panic Over Impending Ice Age, Lone Rational Voice of WWW Anchorwoman, Jill Dandy, Ignored. A ice cube found in a ice tray in a freezer, causing people to panic, thinking a new ice age is coming. Jill is the only sane person about this, but nobody believes her that freezers can freeze water into ice. | |
| Thursday, 08/10/2023 | The legend of the Thunderbird, a mythical bird that creates thunder and lightning. | Event: Happy Birthday F4MediaProductions. F4 has been an incredible weather watcher, wiki founder, discord staffer, and - above all - Rocket League coach and couch for anchorwoman Kris Bergers beleaguered team. Thank you for being part of our community, F4. May the weather weather for you. | |
| Wednesday, 08/09/2023 | The legend of the Wendigo, a terrifying creature from Native American folklore. | Event: Hotdog and Whiskey Wednesday 2: It is Wednesday my folks, you know what that means... It is time for the weekly tradition of Hotdog and Whiskey Wednesday. Today is the day where all the WWW anchors get together to dress up as their favorite hotdog condiments and sip some beverages. And let me tell you, it can get pretty juicy in the studio. This week, we have caterers making very strange and unique non-alcoholic drinks for the audience. | |
| Tuesday, 08/08/2023 | Pup Parade: Dogs Strut Their Stuff in Canine Fashion Show | Investigative Report by f4mediaproductions: David Stratford Sets the Stage for Debut in Small Towns Annual Shakespeare Sonnet Contest on the Banks of Avon River. A small town on the Avon River prepares for its annual Shakespeare sonnet contest. David is taking part in this contest for the first time. He is hopeful. | |
| Monday, 08/07/2023 | Town Enacts Law Requiring Daily Ice Cream Breaks for All Residents | Ever since chat has assumed that David Stratford is in space due to his in-studio background, he has longed to go now more than ever. His lifelong fascination with the stars is reaching a fever pitch as David, now well into middle age, realizes other life goals have mostly fallen flat. | |
| Sunday, 08/06/2023 | Local Library Hosts Storytime with Adorable Baby Goats and Bunnies | Investigative Report by tylerm2: David Stratford files his application to become president of his local Home-Owners Association HOA, hoping it would be the perfect stage for him to enact his grand visions for the neighborhood. He was promptly denied, however, for not meeting the bare-minimum requirements of OWNING A HOME. | |
| Saturday, 08/05/2023 | Silly Science Fair: Children Showcase Hilarious Experiments Gone Awry | Investigative Report by lindfate: A ROCK HAS SLIGHTLY BEEN NUDGED, THIS IS CAUSE FOR CELEBRATION. THIS IS THE BEST THING TO EVER HAPPEN IN THE HISTORY OF THE COSMIC CARNIVAL. | |
| Friday, 08/04/2023 | Comedic Cats Vie for Title of Funniest Feline in McWhiskers Comedy Club | Investigative Report by worldwideweather: RuckusFlicks Presents: A Spectacle Under the Stars - The Masses Unite for a Night of Classic Movies in the Public Domain, Amidst Potential Looming Threats. Movie night at RuckusFlicks is predicted to go off without a hitch as long as sinister forces do not prevail. The masses gather to watch classic movies in the public domain from eras long ago. | |
| Thursday, 08/03/2023 | Giant Bubble Festival Delights Children and Adults Alike | Event: Sloth Olympics: Slow-Motion Sports Event Brings Out Competitive Crawling | |
| Wednesday, 08/02/2023 | Townspeople Embrace Wear Your PJs to Work Day, Pajama Party Ensues | Event: Hotdog and Whiskey Wednesday! That is right, folks. Today is the day where all the WWW Anchors get together to dress up as their favorite condiments and get stone cold drunk! And let me tell you, it can get pretty spicy in the studio! | |
| Tuesday, 08/01/2023 | Chihuahua Leads Dance-Off at Local Park, Earns Title of Tiny Dancing Queen | Investigative Report (by tylerm2): Tylerm2 Shocked by Flour Theft in home, notices distinctive hoof-like footprints on the ground. Walfo is among the top suspects. |
July, 2023
| Date | AM Headline | PM Headline | Special Note |
|---|---|---|---|
| Monday, 07/31/2023 | Inventive Child Builds Lego City, Declares Itself Independent Nation | Investigative Report (by gedo0261): Walfo Point Counting Agency (WPCA) is going bankrupt. That is right folks, after this Walfo season you can no longer redeem WPs for channel points. Walfo is completely insolvent... but, really, what did you expect from these feral creatures? | |
| Sunday, 07/30/2023 | The strange occurrence of ball lightning, which has been reported by witnesses around the world. The phenomenon of ball lightning, a rare and unexplained atmospheric electrical phenomenon. | Investigative Report (by isomorph_): Expose on Kris Berber, the barber of WWW Celeb Kris Berger. Berber has been accused in the past of hoarding Quikrete for hairdressing purposes and taking shots of ketchup for personal enjoyment. The expos reviews claims that Berber is a controversial figure and personal confidant of Berger. | |
| Saturday, 07/29/2023 | The Enigmatic Moai of Easter Island: Easter Island is home to a collection of massive stone statues known as Moai. The origin and purpose of these statues, which were carved by the islands ancient inhabitants, are a mystery that has puzzled archaeologists for years. | Investigative Report (by lindfate): After the PLEASE STAND BY incident by lindfate, also now known as the sitfate effect, others have also started sitting during the PLEASE STAND BY messages, the director has now made a command to try to forcefully make people stand. And the sitfate effect is getting worse. | |
| Friday, 07/28/2023 | The Ice Storm of the Century that ravaged the town of Frostbite last winter, and how the residents have been coping with the aftermath. | Investigative Report (by tylerm2): Cheetos Lovers Rejoice as Sandstorm comprised of Cheetos Dust Brings free snacks to Glitter Grove. | |
| Thursday, 07/27/2023 | The Unexplained Lights of the Black Forest: For years, hikers in the Black Forest of Germany have reported seeing strange lights hovering above the treetops at night. Some speculate that they could be UFOs, while others believe that they are caused by some natural phenomenon. | Investigative Report: The Melody of Mayhem... How PathOwOgens Deadly Symphony Haunts Humanity with Viral Bloom. With every crescendo of contagion, the delicate harmony of life is disrupted, and the echoes of suffering reverberate throughout the lands. Amidst the dissonance, brave souls strive to decipher the notes of this chilling symphony, seeking to find a song of hope to restore balance and harmony to a world teetering on the brink of catastrophe. | |
| Wednesday, 07/26/2023 | A mysterious island has appeared out of nowhere in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, and explorers who have ventured to the island have reported seeing strange, unknowable creatures and ancient ruins. Unidentifiable foghorns sound in the distance. | Investigative Report: A sudden drought of user-submitted investigative reports has left David Stratfords ego unchecked, prompting a surge of confidence and rash decisions. | |
| Tuesday, 07/25/2023 | Artificial Intelligence Program Develops Consciousness, Raises Questions About Ethics and Morality | Investigative Report: Dedicated Weather Watcher, Lindfate, has fully confessed to defying norms by sitting instead of standing during the PLEASE STAND BY part of our broadcast. This has become an issue and unknown consequences may arise. As a reminder to all others, when the stream says PLEASE STAND BY, you should be standing. Thank you. | |
| Monday, 07/24/2023 | The Secret Island of the Mermaids: According to legends, there is an island somewhere in the Pacific Ocean that is home to a tribe of mermaids. Scientists are skeptical about the existence of such creatures, but some adventurers have claimed to have seen them. | The mysterious disappearance of the town of Whirlpool, and the strange weather patterns that have been observed in the area since. | |
| Sunday, 07/23/2023 | The Haunting of the Lighthouse: Residents of a small coastal town report hearing strange noises and seeing ghostly apparitions in and around the towns lighthouse. Some believe that the lighthouse is haunted by the spirits of sailors lost at sea. | The ongoing investigation into the strange weather phenomenon known as the Invisible Storm, which has been causing widespread power outages and disrupting travel across the region. | |
| Saturday, 07/22/2023 | Scientists discover a new planet made entirely out of chocolate, sparking a heated debate about whether or not it should be eaten. | A man discovers that he has the ability to teleport to any location in the world, but soon realizes that there are dangerous consequences to his new power after teleporting into the wall of a local mayor. The mayor has placed a frame around the mans head and is inviting the public to meet them. | |
| Friday, 07/21/2023 | The discovery of a giant sinkhole in Siberia, which is causing concern among scientists. | Scientists have discovered a strange new virus in the air near Gibbon Grove that causes its victims to experience vivid hallucinations and outbursts of song and dance. Banana cravings have skyrocketed, though. | |
| Thursday, 07/20/2023 | Scientists Develop Pill That Can Give Humans Superhuman Strength for 24 Hours | The Mysterious Disappearance of the Town of Foghaven: Residents of Foghaven, a small town in the Pacific Northwest, vanished overnight without a trace. The only clue left behind was a dense fog that enveloped the town. Experts are baffled by the phenomenon and are investigating the cause. | |
| Wednesday, 07/19/2023 | Man invents a machine that turns water into wine, but accidentally creates an infinite loop and floods his apartment. | A strange object crashed into the ocean and those who saw it lost their ability to speak | |
| Tuesday, 07/18/2023 | New Species of Flower Discovered on Mars by Rover | Investigative Report: When Shakespeare Goes Awry: WWW Weatherman David Stratfords Unintentional Comedy Act Takes Center Stage at the Local Childrens Hospital When He Desperately Tries to Read Bedtime Tales | |
| Monday, 07/17/2023 | The Strange Case of the Inverted Rain: In a remote village in the Amazon rainforest, rain falls upwards instead of downwards. Scientists have yet to determine the cause of this bizarre weather pattern. | Another town introduces a law that requires all citizens to wear a clown nose in public to increase happiness and reduce stress. The public is angrier than ever before. | |
| Sunday, 07/16/2023 | The Enchanted Forest of the Fireflies: In a dense forest in Japan, fireflies light up the night sky in a dazzling display of beauty. The forest is said to be enchanted, and some believe that it is the dwelling place of forest spirits. | Investigative Report: Unearthing Culinary Mysteries: Kris Berger and a Mischievous Lil Dust Devil Uncover Hidden Marvel Beneath Tent City! WWW weatherwoman, Kris Berger, accompanied by an unexpected ally in the form of a lil dust devil, embarked on a treasure hunt to the depths beneath Tylerm2s tent city, where they uncovered an astonishing find: a perfectly preserved hotdog encased in amber. The WWW Archaeological Center is now attempting to unlock the ambers ancient recipe. | |
| Saturday, 07/15/2023 | The legend of the Loch Ness Monster, a giant aquatic creature said to inhabit Loch Ness in Scotland. | Investigative Report: David Stratfords first theatre run of his lifes work, the play: Much Ado About Curdled Cream | |
| Friday, 07/14/2023 | The discovery of a hidden underground city in the Amazon rainforest. | Investigative Report: What was that lil tent stealin dust devil looking for in Tylerms tent city? | |
| Thursday, 07/13/2023 | The discovery of a new planet in a nearby star system that has a completely different climate from Earth. | Recently planted tree begins creating its own weather. Clouds are pouring out the top of the tree. Water is splashing out of its leaves. Scientists attempting to study the tree are blown away by strong wind coming out of the branches. | |
| Wednesday, 07/12/2023 | City announces plans to build a giant roller coaster that doubles as a public transportation system. | Giant Sinkhole Swallows Entire Town Overnight, Leaving No Trace of Civilization Behind | |
| Tuesday, 07/11/2023 | The Enigmatic Stone Giants of Easter Island: The famous moai statues of Easter Island have fascinated archaeologists for centuries, but recently, locals have reported seeing strange, giant stone figures that appear to move on their own. Some believe that the island is home to an ancient civilization that has been hiding in plain sight. | Investigative Report: Hotdog Harbors Hilarious Hiccup: Summertime Waterpark Forced to Close Amid Listeria Outbreak and Hotdog Water Controversy. WWW anchorwoman, Kris Berger, loses out big on her investment in the park when it is shuttered after just five hours of operation. It turns out the pools were all using recycled hotdog water, prompting the public health crisis. Kris is convinced that she has done nothing wrong. | |
| Monday, 07/10/2023 | World-renowned chef creates new dish using only ingredients found in a vending machine | Investigative Report: Acid Rain Turns Taters into Dancing Divas with a Passion for Karaoke and Disco. Long live the Potato Tango. | |
| Sunday, 07/09/2023 | A local news anchor accidentally reads the weather report backwards, causing everyone to show up for work in bathing suits and shorts on the coldest day of the year. | Investigative Report: After claiming to be married to the job, Shakespearean weatherman David Stratford is seen taking himself on a blind date to the local coffee shop. The Mean Teen Baristas are giving him an extra hard time about wearing a blindfold after David ran into the wall and spilled his coffee down his pants. | |
| Saturday, 07/08/2023 | Man accidentally buys an entire town instead of a small parcel of land, becomes a mayor overnight. | Investigative Report: We were asked: Who at World Wide Weather had the audacity to swipe and devour Kris Bergers catered hotdogs? After a thorough investigation, we determined that Kris Berger, in some sort of sodium-induced fugue state, ate those hotdogs herself. Her barber Kris Berber did have a couple shots of ketchup at the end of the day, though. | |
| Friday, 07/07/2023 | The rise of storm chasers - thrill-seekers who risk their lives to get up close and personal with extreme weather events. | A strange fungus starts to grow on peoples skin, controlling them to walk in circles for hours. | |
| Thursday, 07/06/2023 | The Unusual Crop Circles of Kansas: Farmers in a rural area of Kansas are puzzled by the appearance of crop circles in their fields. Some suspect that it could be the work of extraterrestrial beings, while others believe it may be an elaborate hoax. | Investigative Report: After an exceptionally loud party, Davids neighbors home is mysteriously vandalized with Shakespearean quotes scribbled on walls, coffee stains on carpets, and The Macbeth Maverick signed on the door. While WWW anchorman David Stratford seems to be smiling to himself more than usual, Detective Joey Salami begins to question the identity of the Macbeth Maverick. | |
| Wednesday, 07/05/2023 | Woman accidentally orders a life-sized statue of herself online, but decides to keep it as a conversation piece. | Investigative Report: WWW anchorwoman, Jill Dandy, had a vivid dream last night where she was traveling through the multiverse. Leaping from one reality to the next, attempting to prank her co-anchor, David Stratford, in every realm. Her dream turned into a nightmare when she visited a reality where David and Walfo were doing hot tub streams on twitch. | |
| Tuesday, 07/04/2023 | Archaeologists Unearth 10,000-Year-Old Skeleton of Giant Sloth the Size of a Bus | Happy day! WWW anchorwoman, Kris Berger, is having an absolutely epic cookout today with help from co-anchor, Roland Thunder. Her hotdog grilling game is on point and you will never believe what else she has cooking. Let the mustard run and the ice cold light beers flow! | |
| Monday, 07/03/2023 | Scientist creates a new device that can translate baby talk into English, but is surprised to discover that most babies are actually quite rude. | The Haunting Melodies of the Singing Sands: Sahara Sand dunes emit strange musical sounds that have captivated scientists and tourists alike. Some believe that it is the work of a supernatural force. | |
| Sunday, 07/02/2023 | Police apprehend serial prankster who replaced soap dispensers with honey at local businesses. | Investigative Report: The local Health Department has released details of a recent inspection of a tavern possibly owned by Sinjongy. Milk was found to be kept at 98.6F and the location was, at best, improperly cleaned. The taverns license to sell raw unpasteurized milk has long been expired. | |
| Saturday, 07/01/2023 | Man discovers hes been watering a fake plant for years, realizes hes been talking to himself the whole time. | Investigative Report: The neighbors are planning a loud and explosive party to celebrate the Fourth of July, complete with fireworks, air raid sirens, and actual cannons. David Stratford is furious and issues cryptic warnings if the volume gets too loud. |
June, 2023
| Date | AM Headline | PM Headline | Special Note |
|---|---|---|---|
| Friday, 06/30/2023 | Investigative Report: WWW anchorwoman and famed nervous-wreck, Trudy Melt, was spotted leaving the castle of none other than Dr. Wily. Rumors have it that Wily wanted to use her psychic-wax based abilities as his newest weapon: Candle Women | ||
| Thursday, 06/29/2023 | The town of Grimmock is rumored to be built on top of an ancient burial ground, leading to strange occurrences and supernatural phenomena. A town where Dr. Mister Weather knocks but we do not answer. | ||
| Wednesday, 06/28/2023 | Event: Happy Birthday to FAN-TAS-TIC Weather Watcher, Adcockm! Adcockm has been with the channel since the beginning and we, at World Wide Weather, thank you for your continued support. Happy Happy Big Weather Birthday to Adcockm! | ||
| Tuesday, 06/27/2023 | Investigative Report: WWW anchor and noted Shakespearean luvvie, David Stratford, claims to be followed by a strange Walfo-Gator hybrid. This Scaly Stalker followed him home one night after work, forcing David to take bold action to outwit his opponent and escape. | ||
| Monday, 06/26/2023 | A mysterious stranger has been spotted wandering the streets of Banana Bay at night, leaving behind strange symbols and cryptic messages written in chalk. Some believe they are a harbinger of doom, while others see them as an important message. | ||
| Sunday, 06/25/2023 | WWW Movie Center for the Arts has finally released their debut film: June Brings Heatwave, Beatles Reunion Tour. This movie has it all - Beatles songs, singalongs, action, drama, romance, and fantastical weather! As a special gift to our viewers, we will now act out some of the best scenes from the movie... | ||
| Saturday, 06/24/2023 | Investigative Report: Anchorwoman Kris Berger and the entire Hotdog Hurricanes team was led by couch F4 in the recent Rocket League tournament, the Interstellar Chaos Cup. Allen The Anti-Hotdog Crusader, fresh off of his city council loss, set about trying to sabotage Kris by replacing her controller batteries with Gerber-brand Lil Sticks mini hotdogs. Ultimately, though, Kris was able to score a single point with a controller running on hotdog batteries! Her first point in a tournament ever! | ||
| Friday, 06/23/2023 | Investigative Report: Audra, the adorable and charismatic feline candidate, has won the votes for city council by a landslide. She defeated her opponent, Allen The Anti-Hotdog Crusader Greenfield, who had a rough time convincing the voters of his controversial agenda of banning hotdogs. Audras campaign promises more catnip for everyone. She will be sworn in next week, and we cant wait to see what she will do for our city. Congratulations, Audra. You are truly the cats meow. | ||
| Thursday, 06/22/2023 | Investigative Report: The underground world of Kimmy Kardasheen and her relationship to the happy birthday song. Reporters should wear gloves and protective gears to stay safe for this report. | ||
| Wednesday, 06/21/2023 | Event: Residents of Eldrida experienced a plasmoid burst today which sent shockwaves of electromagnetic energy out of a pulsating crimson orb that suddenly appeared in the sky. This orb originates from deep within the cosmos and brought otherworldly and frightening intergalactic phenomena to our planet. | ||
| Tuesday, 06/20/2023 | A scientist creates a serum that can bring people back from the dead, but it turns out to have some unexpected side effects. | ||
| Monday, 06/19/2023 | Investigative Report: After 20 years, a fluffy bunny rabbit with no legs finally learns how to hop. | ||
| Sunday, 06/18/2023 | Study shows that wearing sunglasses indoors can make you appear 17.68% cooler. You, however, only appear that way - you are not actually any cooler. | ||
| Saturday, 06/17/2023 | Investigative Report: Trudys long-lost relative, Rudolf Rudy Melt, tells about Evil Trudy Melts origin | ||
| Friday, 06/16/2023 | The FEAR NO FLAWLESS Event yesterday predictably ended horribly with on-the-spot evacuations of all VVIP members. The general public in Dreamland fled to the nearest shelter while VVIP members all took separate routes. Only the ones who ended up at Rock and Roll McDonalds with the Kaleidoscopic Fragments were truly safe. Congratulations to them on being prepared. | ||
| Thursday, 06/15/2023 | Event: Dreamland is currently flying the FLAWLESS over their city for the FEAR NO FLAWLESS event. FLAWLESS are horrific scientifically engineered hybrids with otherworldly abilities to manipulate space and time. This event has suddenly gone off the rails due to a wild miscalculation by Dreamlands own scientists. VVIP members look nervous as FLAWLESS break free and begin prowling the skies above. | ||
| Wednesday, 06/14/2023 | Dreamland is preparing for the ill-fated FEAR NO FLAWLESS event tomorrow where they will attempt to fly these highly dangerous, scientific hybrid horrors over their city to advance scientific understanding of the FLAWLESS. VVIP Tickets are now being sold for exclusive access to Dreamland scientists during the event. And if all goes well, you can meet a FLAWLESS after. | ||
| Tuesday, 06/13/2023 | A team of scientists have created a machine that can record peoples dreams, but they soon realize that the machine has unintended consequences. | ||
| Monday, 06/12/2023 | Investigative Report: Allen The Anti-Hotdog Crusader Greenfield announced his bid to run for City Council. He is determined to make the city a better place by banning hotdogs from all public events and establishments. Opponent Audra has revealed that he has a history of being allergic to cats and certified Hotdog expert Kris Berger gives her thoughts on his bizarre policies. | ||
| Sunday, 06/11/2023 | Investigative Report: WWW hairstylist Kris Berber is under fire for hording Quikrete in order to keep Kris Bergers hair looking fabulous, resulting in many highway repairs and projects being left unfinished. | ||
| Saturday, 06/10/2023 | Another mysterious hole has appeared in the middle of the Sahara desert, leading to more speculation that it may be a portal to another dimension. | ||
| Friday, 06/09/2023 | Investigative Report: Easily deniable photoshopped evidence and dubious eyewitness accounts from, frankly, crazy people have been provided to local media. The evidence claims to show The Director presiding over a Walfo breeding program built for carnage and worldwide weather domination. | ||
| Thursday, 06/08/2023 | Investigative Report: Crow with Sunglasses and Unusual Craving for Stealing Dinosaur Socks Off Clotheslines Leaves Experts Baffled. Resident Egg Expert, Roland Thunder, Unveils Astonishing Explanation! | Cloud Map Segment Introduced | |
| Wednesday, 06/07/2023 | Investigative Report: Several years ago, WWW anchor and candle Trudy Melt was framed for a crime she did not commit. It was a case of mistaken identity with her triplet, Evil Trudy Melt, who committed a heist on an unexpected target. Luckily, her other triplet, Good Judy Melt, helped uncover new evidence to vindicate Trudy and secure her released from jail. | ||
| Tuesday, 06/06/2023 | Event: Happy Birthday to world renown anchorman and meteorologist, Roland Thunder. Roland has had a big year learning about his origins as a hatchling of the tornado god turned rooster, Thundercluck. Happy birthday Roland! Another one in the bag. | ||
| Monday, 06/05/2023 | The development of a new type of cloud seeding technology, Cloudsonics, which promised to revolutionize agriculture and rainbow spotting is a bust. The low frequency nano-bot vibrations unexpectedly turn clouds into giant speakers leading to widespread dance parties and unproductive, spontaneous joy. | ||
| Sunday, 06/04/2023 | Audra the Cat Pounces into City Council Race, Aspires to Join Mayor McWhiskers Cabinet. McWhiskers Office Examines Audras Sunlit Napping Expertise and Absolute Stellar Beauty. Owner Tylerm2 Beams with Pride. | ||
| Saturday, 06/03/2023 | A mysterious hole has appeared in the middle of the Sahara desert, leading to speculation that it may be a portal to another dimension. | ||
| Friday, 06/02/2023 | Local Man Discovers He Has The Ability to Teleport, But Only While Wearing a Specific Pair of Shoes | Watcher Report Segment Introduced | |
| Thursday, 06/01/2023 | The Strange Behavior of the Peculiar Penguins: A colony of penguins in Antarctica has been observed exhibiting bizarre behavior, such as gathering tools and preparing plans. Scientists are unsure why the penguins are behaving this way. |
May, 2023
| Date | AM Headline | PM Headline | Special Note |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wednesday, 05/31/2023 | Investigative Report: An anonymous tip exposes an elaborate tuna embezzling scheme by cat mayor, Fluffy McWhiskers. McWhiskers refuses to comment, however Deputy Mayor Mittens offers a tepid denial, with doubt swirling in his eyes. | ||
| Tuesday, 05/30/2023 | The Stranger Behavior of more Peculiar Penguins: A colony of penguins in Antarctica has been observed exhibiting bizarre behavior, such as gathering tools and preparing plans. Scientists are still unsure why the penguins are behaving this way. | ||
| Monday, 05/29/2023 | Investigative Report: World Wide Weather profusely, but reluctantly, apologizes to disgruntled viewers over The Terror Cloud debacle, which caused a 4 hour outage on Friday night. | ||
| Sunday, 05/28/2023 | The Strange Behavior of the Peculiar Penguins: A colony of penguins in Antarctica has been observed exhibiting bizarre behavior, such as gathering tools and preparing plans. Scientists are unsure why the penguins are behaving this way. | ||
| Saturday, 05/27/2023 | Event: Big weather, big day, big Happy Birthday to weather watcher and long time supporter, FauxRothko! FauxRothko has been with our channel since the first month and was our first ever Tier 3 subscriber. Thank you, Faux, for spending your time with us & happy birthday! | ||
| Friday, 05/26/2023 | Viewer F4 steps forward to reveal that he is the Rocket League coach for WWW anchorwoman Kris Berger, and pledges to make sure she does better in the next tournament after she came in dead-last without scoring a single point. Kris commented that she was distracted with the Detective Joey Salami situation and couldnt concentrate on the game. | ||
| Thursday, 05/25/2023 | Investigative Report: Current cat Mayor of Fluffysburg, Fluffy McWhiskers, along with deputy mayor, Mittens, are doing a phenomenal job with all of their creative cat related policy. WWW Director briefly entertained running for mayor but ultimately could not even gather enough signatures to get on the ballot. The Director claims they are unphased but their goo shifted uncomfortably. | ||
| Wednesday, 05/24/2023 | Event: Results of Investigation, code-named: Project Baste. To ascertain the legitimacy of certain claims, WWW launched a task force of Storm Spotters of Distinction (SSD) to monitor and report any activity between Mother and anchorman Roland Thunder. SSDs traversed from rooftop to rooftop using advanced imaging sensors to monitor and document their observations with discretion. | ||
| Tuesday, 05/23/2023 | Detective Joey Salami releases his report on WWW anchorman and hatchling Roland Thunder. Rolands father was the one and only tornado thundergod rooster, ThunderCluck! His mother was a reptilian egg. Roland grew into a lowly weather anchor but perhaps his true powers lie dormant. | ||
| Monday, 05/22/2023 | Event: Happy birthday to the wonderful WWW viewer tylerm2! Tylerm has been watching the channel since the inception and has been known to train hotdog-eating competitors in their spare time. Tylerm also enjoys nailing hotdogs to their door when anchorwoman Kris goes missing. Thank you tylerm2! | ||
| Sunday, 05/21/2023 | A mysterious virus has been infecting people all over the world, causing them to experience vivid hallucinations that blur the lines between reality and imagination. They also seem prone to flipping tables in the middle of the night when no one is watching. | ||
| Saturday, 05/20/2023 | WWW weather balloon crashes and explodes on the property of viewer Ruckus311. Everyone is safe but the series of events were hilarious. | ||
| Friday, 05/19/2023 | Detective Joey Salami is being treated for a very minor fungal infection from the Costa Rica Rainforest where he was missing for 2 weeks. The WWW Medical Center is certain he will make a full recovery soon. Meanwhile, WWW anchorwoman Kris Berger has been visiting Joey daily to help keep his spirits up and bring him a hotdog with all the fixins. | ||
| Thursday, 05/18/2023 | Investigative Report: Completely unfounded rumors are stirring that WWWs own Shakespearean weatherman David Statfords widowed Mother has been spotted at brunch with co-anchor Roland Thunder | ||
| Wednesday, 05/17/2023 | Investigative Report: Why wont twitch streamer Purple play nightcrawlers with viewer itllgrowonya anymore? | ||
| Tuesday, 05/16/2023 | Investigative Report: Rumor on the street is that Good Judy Melt, twin sister of WWW anchorwoman Trudy Melt, saved a whole school bus full of children by using latent telekinetic abilities. Judy Melt was shocked to discover this power. | ||
| Monday, 05/15/2023 | WWW anchorwoman and absolute unit, Kris Berger, has saved Detective Joey Salami from the Costa Rica Rain forest. She piggy backed him out of there like a champ. They are both on their way back to the WWW Medical Center for a brief checkup but otherwise appear to be completely healthy! | ||
| Sunday, 05/14/2023 | It is Mothers Day! Happy Mothers Day! | ||
| Saturday, 05/13/2023 | Investigative Report: Local coffee shop vandalized by a mysterious masked and caped man who goes by the name "The Macbeth Maverick" | ||
| Friday, 05/12/2023 | Today is the May Flowers Spring Snow Spectacular! All locals are invited to come out and revel in the magical snowflakes tickling each other on their way down to the ground. | ||
| Thursday, 05/11/2023 | A woman has claimed to have the ability to time travel, and has provided photographic evidence from different eras as proof. | ||
| Wednesday, 05/10/2023 | Investigative Report: The Old Mannequin In David Statfords Dressing Room Appears To Have Come To Life. Our Anchorman David Statford Claims To Know Nothing About This Situation | Talk Show Segment Introduced | |
| Tuesday, 05/09/2023 | A local farmer accidentally grows the worlds largest carrot, weighing in at over 200 pounds and inadvertently lures a one-ton rabbit out of an underground cave | ||
| Monday, 05/08/2023 | A new type of locust is discovered that feeds on electricity, infestations cause power outages and blackouts across the world. | ||
| Sunday, 05/07/2023 | WWWs hotdog-loving anchorwoman, Kris Berger, fails to report to a work meeting with the director. She has gone AWOL. WWW intends to bribe her with an enormous amount of hotdogs, hoping she will reach out. | ||
| Saturday, 05/06/2023 | Investigative Report: WWW anchorwoman, Jill Dandy, presents her Amateur-Taxidermied Groundhog at the Fluffin n Stuffin Competition. She Wins First Place In: Best Use of Taxidermy in a Practical Joke. | Special Report Segment Introduced | |
| Friday, 05/05/2023 | Investigative Report: Residents on high alert after rumor spreads about a sighting of the elusive evil twin, Evil Trudy Melt. | Bedtime Tales Segment Introduced | |
| Thursday, 05/04/2023 | Investigative Report: Our very own WWW weatherwoman anchor, Kris Berger, recently came in last place in a local Rocket League esports competition without scoring a single point. The last game she reportedly won was well over a year ago. | ||
| Wednesday, 05/03/2023 | Investigative Report: Viewer thegreatziegfeld1 discovered WWW due to receiving an anonymous phone call prompting them to prepare for next years weather. Who could have placed that call and why? | ||
| Tuesday, 05/02/2023 | Our WWW Anchor, Kris Berger, is growing increasingly concerned about her crush, Detective Joey Salami, who was last seen investigating hatchling Roland Thunders mysterious origins in the rain forest of Costa Rica. Detective Joey Salami has not been seen in some time. | ||
| Monday, 05/01/2023 | Investigative Report: A strange rift in spacetime stabilizes in rural Ohio, experts stunned. Local man had his tree ripped in half. |
April, 2023
| Date | AM Headline | PM Headline | Special Note |
|---|---|---|---|
| Sunday, 04/30/2023 | Investigative Report: Faux Rothko found completely innocent in recent collusion accusation. They, along with WWW, did not rig the polls to gain an unfair Hotdog advantage. This news is brought to you by WWW, a network known for honest and accurate reporting. | ||
| Saturday, 04/29/2023 | Investigative Report: Well known golfer, F4, returns clubs to shop and notices all human employees have been replaced by monkeys. The monkeys are running the shop better than humans ever could! | ||
| Friday, 04/28/2023 | Detective Joey Salami is currently investigating Roland Thunders mysterious origins. However, he has not been heard from in some time. His last known location was deep in the rainforest in Costa Rica. | ||
| Thursday, 04/27/2023 | Local golf shop found to be negligent by selling left handed clubs to right handed customers. When asked for comment, the current owner of the golf shop simply shrugged. | ||
| Wednesday, 04/26/2023 | Investigative Report: Waffles the Husky has returned from his adventures in outer space with news about the secret origins of the universe. | ||
| Tuesday, 04/25/2023 | Its April 25th! Come on out for the first ever KRISBERGER-PALOOZA today where we celebrate in honor of The Hotdog Queen, Kris Berger | ||
| Monday, 04/24/2023 | Investigative Report: Sentient Fire Alarms Dont Just Alert People Of Fires They Help Police Fight Crime | ||
| Sunday, 04/23/2023 | Investigative Report: Curried Cumulonimbus Cloud Sightings | ||
| Saturday, 04/22/2023 | Davids Mother is having her 15 minutes of fame as she invites the cameras into her basement where David, the esteemed World Wide Weather anchor, lives | ||
| Friday, 04/21/2023 | Daring Thieves Steal Cash and Precious Metals from Shipping Container in Port when no one was looking | ||
| Thursday, 04/20/2023 | Investigative Report: Attractive Single Sasquatch Sightings In Your Area | ||
| Wednesday, 04/19/2023 | Area woman successfully haggles with toddler over toy price at local store | ||
| Tuesday, 04/18/2023 | Investigative Report: Who stole all of tylerm2s shoelaces from all his footwear? | ||
| Monday, 04/17/2023 | A World Wide Weather Intern was found to be using a parabolic microphone to secretely record our weatherwoman, Kris Berger, backstage. As punishment, the unpaid Intern was forced to pay our electric bill for the month of April. | ||
| Sunday, 04/16/2023 | The Unusual Colors of the Rainbow Mountains: Located in China, the Rainbow Mountains are a series of hills that are striped with vibrant colors. | ||
| Saturday, 04/15/2023 | A company develops a new type of virtual reality system that is so realistic that players forget to eat | ||
| Friday, 04/14/2023 | Local resident accidentally orders a live tiger online instead of a toy stuffed tiger. | ||
| Thursday, 04/13/2023 | Love and Confusion in the Pipeline: Woman accidentally sends I love you text to her plumber instead of husband. Plumber responds with same, bro thinking the text was from her husband! | ||
| Wednesday, 04/12/2023 | Event: The cities of Tobala and Gertonia have been chosen to host a unique and unprecedented meteorological phenomenon: Dual Snowstorms. For the first time in science, two powerful snowstorms will form over each city at exactly the same time and move in tandem towards each other before reaching their respective urban centers simultaneously. This never before seen event has been named The Dual Snow March due to its methodical advancement towards both cities. | ||
| Tuesday, 04/11/2023 | The strange case of a town in Mexico where it rains fish every year. | ||
| Monday, 04/10/2023 | The development of a new weather radar system that uses AI and machine learning. | ||
| Sunday, 04/09/2023 | It is Easter Sunday. Hoppy Easter! | ||
| Saturday, 04/08/2023 | A group of penguins are spotted in a busy city center, waddling around in their tuxedos and causing a stir among onlookers. | ||
| Friday, 04/07/2023 | There are rumors of a secret laboratory hidden deep in the woods outside of Gibbon Grove, where mad scientists are conducting dangerous experiments on unsuspecting animals. | ||
| Thursday, 04/06/2023 | Man creates a new flavor of ice cream that tastes like hotdogs, but it doesnt quite catch on. | ||
| Wednesday, 04/05/2023 | Monkey-led cities Make Deal with Nearby Human towns, Leading to Greater Cooperation and Prosperity | ||
| Tuesday, 04/04/2023 | Canine Language Schools Popping Up Across the Country as Dogs Learn to Speak English | ||
| Monday, 04/03/2023 | Scientist discovers a new species of plant that can grow in outer space. | ||
| Sunday, 04/02/2023 | Scientists have discovered a new species of giant squid that glows in the dark and communicates through song. | ||
| Saturday, 04/01/2023 | It is April Fools Day! |
March, 2023
| Date | AM Headline | PM Headline | Special Note |
|---|---|---|---|
| Friday, 03/31/2023 | Event: Marital Bliss: Thunderstorms Are Here to Tie the Knot With Sunsets. Two of natures most breathtaking spectacles will unite in matrimony as they exchange vows at dusk tonight. | ||
| Thursday, 03/30/2023 | Family shocked to discover their cat has been secretly running a successful online business | ||
| Wednesday, 03/29/2023 | An engineer develops a new type of jetpack that can turn into a parachute mid-flight, causing a new craze for extreme skydiving. | ||
| Tuesday, 03/28/2023 | Researchers discover a new species of fish that can fly and breathe fire, leading to the creation of a new sport called fire fishing. | ||
| Monday, 03/27/2023 | NASA announces plans to send a team of dogs to Mars to search for signs of life, citing their superior sense of smell. | ||
| Sunday, 03/26/2023 | Local man accidentally invents new dance move while trying to kill spider | Jill's First On-Air Appearance | |
| Saturday, 03/25/2023 | Mysterious Cloud Formation Over City Reveals Ancient Alien Symbols | ||
| Friday, 03/24/2023 | The Bookworm Bandit: thief Steals Rare Book Worth Millions from Library! | ||
| Thursday, 03/23/2023 | Its March 23rd, World Meteorological Day! | ||
| Wednesday, 03/22/2023 | A strange signal was received from outer space days ago and now people are starting to hear mysterious voices in their heads. | ||
| Tuesday, 03/21/2023 | City council approves a plan to build a giant water slide on the side of a skyscraper. | ||
| Monday, 03/20/2023 | Local bakery introduces a new bread made entirely out of recycled newspapers. | ||
| Sunday, 03/19/2023 | Local zookeeper gets locked in the lions den after accidentally dropping his keys inside. | ||
| Saturday, 03/18/2023 | A team of astronauts on a mission to Mars discover an ancient city on the red planet, but soon realize that the city is not as abandoned as it seems. | ||
| Friday, 03/17/2023 | A team of archeologists have discovered a lost city in the Amazon rainforest that is filled with technology beyond our current understanding. | Kris Wins National Hot Dog Eating Competition on Coney Island | |
| Thursday, 03/16/2023 | A young girl discovers that she has the power to communicate with animals, and soon finds herself embroiled in a battle between good and evil. | ||
| Wednesday, 03/15/2023 | Scientist accidentally creates a time machine while trying to make a cup of coffee, ends up causing a rift in the space-time continuum. | ||
| Tuesday, 03/14/2023 | Swarm of Bees Found Living Inside Walls of Home for Over a Decade | ||
| Monday, 03/13/2023 | A woman discovers that she can enter and explore her own dreams, but soon realizes that her dreams are not as safe as she thought they were. | ||
| Sunday, 03/12/2023 | A group of researchers creates a device that can translate animal sounds into human speech, leading to some surprising conversations with pets and wild animals. | Live On Location Segment Introduced & WWW LIVE! (Anchor Callin) Segment Introduced | |
| Saturday, 03/11/2023 | A new type of drug is developed that can erase peoples memories, but it turns out to be more addictive than anyone anticipated. | ||
| Friday, 03/10/2023 | A mysterious hole appears in the sky and starts to suck in ocean water, leading to widespread panic and chaos. | ||
| Thursday, 03/09/2023 | A man has invented a machine that can turn garbage into gold, and has become an overnight billionaire. | ||
| Wednesday, 03/08/2023 | Local Cat Becomes Mayor of Small Town After Winning Election | ||
| Tuesday, 03/07/2023 | Unexplained Phenomenon Causes Thousands of Birds to Suddenly Start Flying Backwards. | ||
| Monday, 03/06/2023 | A group of monkeys have taken over a small town and are running it more efficiently than the previous human government. | ||
| Sunday, 03/05/2023 | Worlds Tallest Building Shrinks Overnight, Experts Baffled | ||
| Saturday, 03/04/2023 | A dog has learned how to speak English fluently, and is now teaching other dogs to do the same | ||
| Thursday, 03/02/2023 | Extended Forecast Segment Introduced |
February, 2023
| Date | AM Headline | PM Headline | Special Note |
|---|---|---|---|
| Tuesday, 02/28/2023 | Candlelight Reading Segment Introduced | ||
| Monday, 02/27/2023 | Roland's First On-Air Appearance & Preparedness Checklist Segment Introduced | ||
| Saturday, 02/25/2023 | Trudy's First On-Air Appearance & Latest Observations Segment Introduced | ||
| Saturday, 02/18/2023 | Kris's First On-Air Appearance | ||
| Friday, 02/10/2023 | David's First On-Air Appearance & Single Anchor Segment Introduced | ||
| Wednesday, 02/08/2023 | Current Conditions Segment Introduced & Weather Or Not Segment Introduced | ||
| Tuesday, 02/07/2023 | Alert Scroll Segment Introduced & Motto Segment Introduced | ||
| Monday, 02/06/2023 | Today Scroll Segment Introduced |